The Distress of the Reincarnated Princess
The Distress of the Reincarnated Princess
On one day in my life as Princess Rosemary, I was sitting in a gently rocking carriage. At the time, I was feeling over the moon for two reasons.
The first reason was also the purpose for my outing today—it was George’s ninth birthday.
As cute as it would’ve been to jump up and down every time a potential fiancé grew a year older, that wasn’t the sort of person I was. But this time felt different; George turning nine meant that I had completely broken Emma’s death flag, which should have killed her while George was still eight years old.
Emma had been lively and full of smiles again today. Although she’d complained about her recent weight gain, she’d been a picture of happiness while we’d shared tea.
I’m so glad. I really am!
The memory brought a smile to my lips. I sensed a chuckle emanating from the other passenger in the carriage. I looked his way, and my gaze locked onto his eyes, which were narrowed gently. He cast his expression downwards and bowed his head, although he didn’t appear to feel guilty.
“Forgive me.”
“Not at all,” I said sincerely.
I wasn’t angry at being laughed at. Or rather, I could tell from the way he’d smiled that he wasn’t making fun of me. It just seemed odd. What exactly had I done to make him laugh?
When I shook my head, confused, he continued as though he had read my mind.
“You were smiling so happily, I couldn’t help but join in,” he whispered with a hint of mischief in his eyes. His gaze was too kind for me to look at directly, so I turned my face down. Even without being able to see myself, I could tell that I was blushing.
I can’t help it. I love him. Of course I’m going to go red when the love of my life smiles at me so kindly. I’m no match for Sir Leonhart; he could’ve wrapped me around his little finger any day.
While looking down, I took the opportunity to casually fix my dress.
I hope it doesn’t look weird.
I wore a sky-blue dress, with intricate and almost transparent Mechlin lace accents decorating the collar and the cuffs, the sleeves extended just to the length of my elbows. I’d chosen silk for the fabric, as velvet would have looked too heavy for the dress style. The décolleté design on the gown was currently in fashion, and was extremely low-cut. I wasn’t, however, confident that I could endure the penance of drawing attention to my flat chest, so I disguised the lack of volume with a rose-themed accessory. Due to the pannier I wore underneath, my skirt flowed out in a gentle curve.
For the first time in my royal life, I’d struggled to decide what to wear. I’d checked myself in the mirror countless times, and each time I’d worried about whether I should choose a different outfit.
This is the uncertain feeling that women endure each time they go on a date, I thought, strangely moved.
Not that I’m on a date. I’m just getting carried away all by myself!
“Will you forgive my discourtesy?”
I was fully enjoying being a girl in love, but Sir Leonhart’s voice brought me back to reality. I promptly raised my head, but was unable to look directly at his smile. I gave my reply with a gaze that was tilted slightly down.
“O-Of course.” I stopped speaking for a moment after stuttering, but managed to compose myself. After mentally reiterating that I should try to act calm, I let out a little puff of breath and continued, “If anything, I’m the one who should be apologizing. I’m terribly sorry for making you accompany me on my personal business today.”
“Please, there is no need to apologize,” said Sir Leonhart good-naturedly.
“But...”
“This is my job,” he continued. “I beg you—do not fret over it.”
It’s his job. That’s exactly right.
There’s no way that he’d have any ulterior reason for chaperoning me. I chastised myself for almost slipping into depression, because I’d known his motives all along. I should be happy just to be with him, like I am now, I told myself.
Back to the point at hand—I’m sure you’ve guessed the second reason why I was full of smiles. My guard for the day was Sir Leonhart.
Usually, guarding me was Klaus’s job. But thankfully—ahem, I meant regrettably—Klaus had the day off for family reasons. Apparently, it was his older brother’s wedding.
Isn’t that wonderful?
“Go on, go on, have a nice trip. Take your time,” I had said without much thought, trying to send him off quickly. He’d hesitated though, because I was scheduled to go out on the same day. He wouldn’t have minded someone else guarding me if I’d been in the palace, minding my own business, but because I was leaving the castle grounds, he had grumbled.
“You leaving the palace is a different matter. When I consider that you might come under attack on the road, or that something might happen to you, I can’t bring myself to leave your side. I don’t want to entrust your guard to anyone else unless they’re at least as skilled as I am, or even better.”
He’d bemoaned and fretted, on and on.
Of course, he’d said that while fully aware that, in terms of raw skill, he was among the top five knights of the royal guard.
I appreciate the concern, but I feel a sudden need to permanently...dispose of you. It’s not easy to deal with stalkers that are skilled.
I guess I’ll have to back down, I thought, ready to give up on my chance to see the Eigels.
Klaus shouldn’t miss his big brother’s wedding for my sake, as celebrations like that don’t happen very often. I’d also wanted to be there myself to witness Emma’s death flag finally break, but with Klaus being so stubborn, there was nothing I could do to obtain both outcomes.
However, somebody noticed my displeasure and put himself forward—Sir Leonhart. Even Klaus couldn’t deny the kingdom’s finest swordsman. Reluctantly, Klaus left for his family’s home, and Sir Leonhart set to guarding me on my visit to the Eigels.
I feel guilty for burdening Sir Leonhart, I really do, but I also want to say this: Nicely done, Klaus. Good job! And thank you too, Klaus’s brother, for sharing a portion of your happiness with me.
“Besides,” Sir Leonhart started, while I was treating Klaus to a rare compliment in my thoughts. He paused for a moment.
“Hmm?” I raised my head to see what the matter was. He smiled when our eyes met.
“No man would ever complain about being assigned to guard such a beautiful princess,” Sir Leonhart continued.
“Ah!” S-So pretentious. But also cool.
Although he wasn’t exactly stone-faced, something about Sir Leonhart made it hard for people to approach him. A single smile from him was immeasurably effective. He, like several other side characters in Hidden World, possessed a healthy amount of gap moe. There was no doubt that a fond look from him could leave any woman swooning.
I’d fallen for him ages ago, so that point should be obvious.
If someone declared “Sir Leonhart can get away with anything and you’ll still love him,” I wouldn’t be able to argue the point. Everything he does is cool. I’d probably still adore him even if he didn’t act how I wanted him to. I know that if Klaus had given me the same compliment, I’d have definitely just ignored him.
“I must give Klaus my thanks. He ought to have arrived at his family’s home by now. I can just imagine the disappointment on his face,” Sir Leonhart said with a playful chuckle. His words pulled me a few inches back to reality.
I can picture his downtrodden look too. I’m definitely not excited about going home.
I wasn’t an overly expressive person, so I was sure that, in the moment, none of my inner thoughts showed on my face. But Sir Leonhart excelled at reading people’s facial expressions. He pursed his lips, acutely grasping that the memory of Klaus had dampened my spirit.
“Has Klaus done anything to trouble you?” he queried.
“What are you asking?” I countered.
The unexpected change in the conversation left me shocked.
“Exactly what it sounds like.” His tone was soft, and his eyes gentle.
I couldn’t sense any ulterior motive, but trying to discern the intention behind his words would have been impossible for me anyway, given the vast difference in our experience points.
Just what could he mean? What truth could he be seeking with his question?
Klaus is indeed troubling me. Like, a lot.
I was most grateful when he carried out his duties in silence, but Klaus was prone to sudden bursts of excitability. And for some reason, he would drown me in compliments. It was more than a few times that I’d found myself cringing at his lengthy, overwrought flattery.
Which of your buttons did I press to make this happen, Klaus? I’d think, while very close to my wits’ end.
He loved it when I glared at him, so I tried to interact with him normally instead, but he loved that too. What was I to do? It was my heartfelt desire for him to reign in his eccentricity a little.
I really doubt that Sir Leonhart’s question is about that though. After all, he’d be in a bind if I were to say, “Your subordinate is an off-the-rails pervert. Do something about him!”
I couldn’t have said anything like that anyway. It would’ve been too impure. Not for me, of course, but I didn’t want to sully Sir Leonhart with it.
“He’s an excellent guard,” I started, after a short while of hesitation. “I’ve never once doubted his prowess.”
I’m technically not lying. It does feel like I’m dodging the question, but let’s just push through.
“Your Highness?”
Sir Leonhart closed off my escape route. Well, not literally. All he had to do was tilt his head and call out to me.
The reason why I felt like he was reproaching me was entirely because I knew that I was being underhanded. I felt like he was telling me to come clean. A sense of awkwardness came over me and I hung my head. Creases formed on my dress where my hands had gripped the fabric unconsciously.
“It would be a lie to say that he’s never done anything to trouble me,” I confessed between intermittent pauses.
I pointed a fearful look at Sir Leonhart, like a child after a scolding. He didn’t appear to be angry. He said nothing, but his calm gaze urged me to continue.
“He’s a little too forward, or rather, I feel that he’s overprotective,” I said, after a pause.
“Overprotective?” Sir Leonhart repeated what I’d said. His eyes drifted up diagonally, as though he were rummaging through his memories. “I suppose so,” he whispered quietly. It seemed that something had come to his mind.
So he is overprotective. I wasn’t just being too self-conscious. Even a third party could tell that he’s not a normal guard. Well, I should’ve expected so. I’d hate it if there were other guards who not only cling to their charge twenty-four hours a day, but also moan about letting anyone else take over their duties.
Sir Leonhart saw my vacant expression and knitted his eyebrows in a troubled frown.
“I’d prefer to quell any misapprehensions that you might have. Klaus is usually devoted to his duties. Despite his cheerful personality, he is a man capable of making level-headed decisions without being swayed by his personal feelings.”
Hearing Sir Leonhart’s appraisal of Klaus left me stumped as to whether we were talking about the same person. At the same time, however, there were parts which I could understand. It had a nice ring to it to call him “decisive”; Klaus had the ability to draw a clear line between those he considered important to him and those he didn’t.
The man does occasionally have a weirdly businesslike side to him.
“Some members of the royal guard have difficulty remaining emotionally detached from their charges. They’re only human, so it may be inevitable to develop a bond with someone they spend so much time with. I had assumed that Klaus wasn’t among their number,” Sir Leonhart said, before looking my way and adding, “Or, he didn’t used to be, anyway.”
I know you’re implying that he’s changed now, and I want you to stop. While we’re at it, I’d rather if you dropped the warm look in your eyes. It’s uncomfortable.
“When Klaus talks of you, he’s like an entirely different person. So full of energy,” said Sir Leonhart.
“T-The two of you talk about me?” I asked, praying to hear a denial. To my horror, Sir Leonhart returned a smile and a nod.
Hold on!
What the fuck, Klaus?
How dare you talk about me! To Sir Leonhart, of all people!
“He was full of joy when he told me that you’re a wonderful person. That you’re intelligent and pure of heart.” Sir Leonhart said this as though recounting a jubilant experience, but despair gripped me. I wasn’t the least bit happy.
I wanted nothing more than to grab Klaus by the collar and shake him until he told me why he was acting like a grandfather boasting about his first grandchild.
“I won’t ask you to forgive him. He blundered by making you feel suffocated. However, I’d like you to bear something in mind, if only a little: his overprotectiveness is a manifestation of his care for you.”
I sat in stunned silence.
He’s trying to calm me down. That’s the impression I received.
Though Sir Leonhart’s words were an apologetic admission of Klaus’s issue, they also seemed like an excuse. Hearing him voice that sentiment was unsatisfying; I felt like it was an opinion drawn from feelings of support for Klaus, and was intended to cover for Klaus’s unsettling behavior.
Feeling uncomfortable, I took advantage of a jolt to the carriage to look away from Sir Leonhart.
It’s not like he’s criticizing me, so why do I feel a bit annoyed?
“I admit that I’m weak.” Before I could stop myself, I was blurting out an almost spiteful counterargument. “I’m fragile enough that anyone guarding me would rest easier if they could just shove me into a box. But I’m a person too. I have a will of my own. Locking me away is about the furthest thing from caring that I can think of.”
My emotions had risen to the surface. Sir Leonhart deepened his strained smile without taking his eyes off me as I ranted. A modicum of composure returned to me after noticing that Sir Leonhart was watching me like I was a child throwing a tantrum.
Taking my anger out on someone who has nothing to do with this. How embarrassing. How old am I?
“You’re not weak at all,” Sir Leonhart said.
“Huh?” I asked, confused.
“Klaus isn’t so easily won over. He wouldn’t swear loyalty to a princess who’s frail and beautiful, but nothing more.”
I was dumbstruck, and Sir Leonhart peered at me. His smile vanished, and a trace of mellowness accompanied his low voice. “In your eyes, he may be just a dog—”
D-Dog? There’s an ominous word. I’m not in the habit of keeping adult men as dogs. If I wanted one, I’d rather have a border collie, or maybe a Shetland sheepdog.
“—But his real nature is that of a wolf. He’ll sink his teeth into even his superiors if they offend him. Under usual circumstances, he is an untamable beast.”
I’ll bet that a sadist could tame him, I thought, but kept quiet. It was probably best not to crack that particular joke.
As truth would have it, Klaus’s recent behavior did give me the impression that he wouldn’t settle for just anyone.
As I mentioned earlier, his superior combat abilities placed him among the top five in the royal guard. He’d soared through the ranks of the knights with an almost unbelievable swiftness, earning his position as a princess’s personal guard even at his young age.
Nevel’s knightly order tended to focus on skill rather than social class—this had enabled him to be promoted, despite having only minor noble holdings. Unfortunately, his skill and upbringing made him a frequent target of envy and harassment. As I was a princess, nobody was dumb enough to badger him in my presence, but I knew that they prodded at him behind my back, in secret.
Klaus, however, wasn’t the chill man his appearance made him out to be. He would dodge physical attacks with elegance and repay insults two times over. His thorough reprisals ensured that none of those nasty people would dare to antagonize him again.
In a way, he’s doing a poor job of being a masochist, isn’t he? What sort of masochist is this aggressive? Maybe all this means is that sadism and masochism are two sides of the same coin.
Huh. I’m not sure where I’m going with this.
“A weak person couldn’t hope to tame him, as you have done. I know that you are a proud princess who wants more out of life than to just be protected. But that desire is also what occasionally puts you in harm’s way.”
Harm’s way? So, looking weak isn’t what puts me in danger? I don’t know what he’s trying to say. How could I be in harm’s way if I’m not weak?
Noticing my confusion, Sir Leonhart shot an admonishing look at me.
“Your Highness, you are capable of walking on your own two feet, thinking things through for yourself, and coming to your own decisions. But there is a limit to what can be achieved by a single person. I beg you to ask for a little more help from those around you.”
“I feel like I do already.” I blinked a few times, stunned by Sir Leonhart’s unexpected warning.
There were only a handful of things I could do entirely by myself. I knew that, and I believed that I did ask others for help.
Like today. I’m making Sir Leonhart act as my guard even while knowing that I’m being selfish.
But he saw things differently, apparently. Sir Leonhart shook his head.
“You need to ask more. You don’t ask nearly enough. Klaus is overprotective precisely because he thinks the same way that I do about this.”
Despite his pleading, I wasn’t able to just nod and say that I understood. Not even for Sir Leonhart. Part of the reason was because I needed to remember my position as princess. My status didn’t allow me to parade my weaknesses in front of everyone.
But the bigger reason was that I had trouble gauging how much was safe to explain.
How much could I rely on others? I knew about future events which hadn’t yet taken place, but who in the world could I explain that to?
I looked down with a stubborn attitude, causing Sir Leonhart to flex a troubled smile.
“I just ask that you remember what I’ve said.”
The day would come when I would recall this statement coming out of his mouth with a bitter tone. At that point I would truly understand what he’d meant.
But that part of the story is still several years in the future.