Shogi on the Grill

“Long day.”

Ai and I stretch in unison after a full day of practice matches at the Kansai Shogi Association’s second floor classroom and give our exhausted minds and bodies a break.

April. Osaka.

I–––holder of the Shogi world’s top title of Dragon King Ryuo—Yaichi Kuzuryu am with my first apprentice, a little girl who just started the fourth grade.

Ai Hinatsuru.

Originally from a traditional style Japanese inn on the north coast, this grade schooler came all the way down here by herself and, after many twists and turns, ended up living with me in my apartment not too far away from the association.

Long story short: she’s my live-in apprentice.

That’s how I’ve ended up living like a father of one at the age of 16. I have to figure out what my apprentice wants for dinner each night …… But the thought of going home and cooking right now is such a drag.

“Ai. What’s your favorite food?” I ask as I put the Shogi pieces back in their box.

My apprentice makes scissors with her fingers as she says, “Cwabby!”

“Crab, huh? It’s not in season, though ……… Oh, what about yakiniku?”

“I love it! I could eat it every day!”

“That settles it! Let’s go chow down on some meat for a pick-me-up before heading home!”

“Yaaay! Meat! Meat!!”

Yakiniku is a style of Japanese BBQ where you get to cook beef, pork or chicken at a grill built into the table.

And Ai can’t wait to go. She’s bouncing around like an explosion of happiness.

Yep! She’s adorable.

I don’t have a Lolita complex or anything, but there’s nothing more precious than a happy little girl. Not in that lolicon way, though.

“But, just the two of us going would be kind of lonely, don’t you think? Mind if I invite some other Shogi players along?”

“Sure! Food tastes better with company♪”

“You got that right! I’ll run up to the Player’s Room real fast.”

Only then, once I went up to the third floor and poked my head inside the Player’s Room and saw who was there, did I realize I’d made a terrible, horrible mistake.

That’s how these things work. You don’t realize how bad your move is before you make it. Only after you take your hand away does it hit you ……

“……”

“……”

The three of us are silent, sitting in a booth at a restaurant called Sumibi Yakiniku Koyan, which is only a five-minute walk away from the association.

By three of us I mean it’s me, Ai–––and Big Sis.

All because Ginko Sora-dual title, my elder sister apprentice who is actually younger than me but joined Master Kiyotaki’s Shogi family tree before I did, happened to be in the Player’s Room when I stopped by, our fun yakiniku dinner filled with laughter and funny stories turned into a silent staring contest.

On a side note, our conversation on the way here consisted of, “Big Sis, what did you do t ……”

“Shogi.”

The end.

What is this: purgatory ……?

What’s worse.

“…… Hey. That girl sitting over there ……”

“Holy?! That’s Snow White ……?!”

“Who’da think that borin’ guy she’s with is ……?”

People at the tables around us start whispering amongst themselves the moment we sit down.

Big Sis has an immensely popular nickname: Naniwa’s Snow White. So many people have heard of her she’s more like an idol in Osaka than a Shogi player.

She gets looks that would put real idols to shame. Skin white like snow and her silver hair make her stand out in a crowd. What’s more, she’s so talented that she claimed the two highest Women’s Shogi Titles, Queen and Women’s Throne, when she was still in grade school. Now in her third year in junior high, her perfect record in Women’s League matches ever since her debut four years ago sounds like something out of a storybook. Big Sis is pretty much a living legend at this point.

I’m not half bad myself, turning pro in junior high and becoming the youngest Ryuo ever, but Big Sis’s beyond human persona overshadows me at every turn. Not that I really care …… It’s fine, okay?!!

“Uh, um ……”

The one braving this uncomfortable, icy atmosphere is Ai.

“Master? Are you sure it’s okay for us to eat here? Everything looks so expensive ……”

“No problem. He made bank last year.”

Big Sis, not me, answers like I’m obviously going to pay for everything.

By the way, every top Shogi player’s total prize money each year is made public. The fact that I, as the Ryuo, make XX hundred thousand yen with each victory and all the money I’ve won in tournaments is available for anyone to see. In other words, Big Sis knows exactly what I’ve got in my wallet.

“His winnings from the Ryuo Title Match come in this year, so he could lose every match and still have more than 40 million yen. Even if he loses his title, just playing in big matches like that gets you something like 5 million, right? Must be nice, being rich. Anyone could keep their own grade school girl pet with that kind of money.”

“…… I wasn’t asking you, Auntie.”

“Who do you think you’re calling Auntie, pipsqueak?”

Butting heads already, these two.

For Big Sis and Ai, who haven’t liked each other since the moment they met, talking like this is like opening a Shogi match with 7 Six Pawn and 3 Four Pawn. In other words, the gloves come off whenever these two are in the same room and I wish they’d cut it already.

“E-easy there, Big Sis. In terms of our Shogi family tree, you are Ai’s aunt so to speak ……”

“Even so, I’m not Auntie. She should be addressing me properly as Sora-sensei or at least Miss Sora, yes?”

“I won’t.”

“Pipsqueak ……”

“Easy there, easy. Eaaasy, easy, easy,” I cut in between them. We could solve this so easily with Shogi if we were at my apartment or the association, but things could get ugly way too quick without any pieces around.

“Sorry, Big Sis. You see, Ai … she’s only just become my apprentice and still has a lot to learn about common sense in the Shogi world …… I’ll make sure to teach her right as soon as we get home. Okay?”

“……”

Big Sis puckers her lips, which she almost never does, and slams me like a kid.

“You’re covering for her?”

“I-I wouldn’t say covering …… But, it’s the Master’s job to teach their apprentice, right?”

“…… Hmh.”

“W-What? Is there something you’re trying to say?”

“Oh, no. What’s wrong with you liking little girls like some lolicon?”

“Look, I’m not like that, okay?! My apprentice just happens to be in grade school, that’s all!!”

“Which would you take as an apprentice, given the choice? A junior high school student or an elementary school student?”

“Huh? The grade schooler, of course.”

“……”

“No, no, no! Who wouldn’t?! Everything in the Shogi world revolves around talent, yeah?! That means the younger, the better, yeah?! Besides, I was six years old when I became an apprentice and you were four, Big Sis! In kindergarten!”

Thunk! That was loud.

Looking around, it seems that Ai dropped the menu she was holding and it hit the floor. It’s not all that bright in here, but I can tell that she’s pale as a ghost.

“M-Master ……”

“J-Just barely, but I’m …… still in single digits, and I’m not very tall so I might still be able to fit into kindergarten clothes …… Ah!! Oh no, I’ll be turning ten soon ……!”

“Hold up. Wait just a second, Ai. That’s not what I was talking about–––.”

“Master! I’ll, I’ll do the best I can! I’ll be just like the cute little girls Master likes! I’ll put off my birthday so I can stay younger that much longer!! I’ll do anything, so please …… Please ……!!”

“Okay! Alright!! Nine-year-olds are just fine!!”

“…… Really?”

“Yes, really!! I love grade school girls!!”

“…… As dates, too?”

“T-That I do. Nine-year-olds are already young ladies if you ask me.”

“E-he-he♡ I love you too, Master!”

Ai dives into my chest, smiling from ear to ear with tears in her eyes.

Big Sis is looking at me like what’s left of a smooshed bug on the side of the road. The restaurant staff and other customers are staring right along with her. Yakiniku restaurants are supposed to be hot, but it’s got to be below freezing in here.

I’ll never be able to eat here again, will I ……? I liked this place, too ……

Completely unfazed by all the wide-eyed stairs in our direction, Big Sis grabs the menu and thinks for a few moments before summoning a waitress.

“Excuse me. Could I get three servings of the top roast, three of the special boneless ribs, three of the outside skirt cut, three square cuts of rump, three servings of beef guts …… make it four, three Chateaubriand tenderloin and three bowls of rice and one bowl of stone-roasted Korean bibimbap rice. Three extra plates, too. Also, three servings of mino rumen, heart and cheek meat each. Oh, and three orange juices. That’s all for now.”

Hungry, are we?

“Hey, uh, Big Sis ……? Are you sure it’s a good idea starting off with top roast and boneless ribs? They’re pretty fatty.”

There’s a Shogi word called overplay, which basically means doing too much. It’s better to start with something light, like tongue.

“Huuh? I’m starving here, so let me eat something I can feel. Oh, excuse me, waitress. Three black-marbled sirloin steaks as well, please.”

“I’m saying you ordered way too much already!! Listen when someone’s talking to you!!”

“What’s wrong with ordering meat at a yakiniku restaurant?! A few pieces of marbled sirloin are nothing to a title holder!!”

“Marbled, marbled, enough! You might as well slide your Rook too, going out on a limb like that!! You’re Static Rook party so stick to the standards, not some marbled offshoot!!”

“Food has nothing to do with Static or Ranging Rook! What’s a Static Rook party member supposed to eat, anyway?!”

“S …… Static …… steaks?”

“Huuh? What kind of meat is that?”

“Ummm …… The hindquarters? Or something ……?” I say while glancing at the menu.

There is a note explaining that rump is the soft meat on the hind legs. It also says that cow pelvises are shaped like an H. So that’s why it’s called an H bone. I learned something new.

Plates of raw meat start arriving at our table while the argument rages on.

“Wow! Everything looks so good!!”

“Look at all those yummy white streaks!”

I can tell Ai is getting excited. One look at all those tenderloins and ribs glinting like powdered snow in this dim restaurant is making my mouth water.

“I’ll start grilling.”

Naniwa’s Snow White grabs the nearest set of tongs and starts laying out the cuts of meat on the wire mesh grill top. Not to be outdone, I start doing the same. Ai’s hands are too small to hold the tongs, so she’s eagerly watching the meat cook from her seat.

That’s when the trouble starts.

Big Sis doesn’t know the meaning of the word patience. She’s the type of person who likes to cook as much meat as possible by filling up every available space on the grill.

On the other hand, I prefer to slowly cook each and every piece to grilled perfection. There’s a charm to that perfect piece of meat fresh off the grill. You can’t just line up slices of meat on the grill and hope for the best.

It’s that difference of opinion that sends sparks flying.

“Yaichi, your efficiency needs work.”

“Okay then, Big Sis. Maybe you should update your technique? You know, people haven’t mixed meats on the grill like that since the 1960s.”

“Oh yeah? Why are you grilling so slow? There’ll never be enough ready for the three of us like that. Don’t waste space.”

“You’re the wasteful one, Big Sis. Seriously, you’re such a newbie at this it’s embarrassing.”

“Huuh? Are you blind? Just look at this perfect formation and tell me what’s being wasted.”

“Right there. That space.”

“Where?”

“Right there, see?”

“Tell me, would you?”

“…… Like – I – said!”

I switch my brain from yakiniku mode into Shogi mode and say, “That skirt cut sitting at 5 Six was clearly a bad move! Get it out of the way ASAP and advance the rib up from 5 Two.”

“But, the rib can only move up the fourth column, yes? Doing that would make a meat tower on the fourth column, and I can tell just by looking that it’s a terrible formation. Nothing can move in a jam like that.”

“What are you talking about?! Moving that rib to 5 Six would make the fatty oils drip onto the flame and make it bigger, yeah? Then heat would reach the meat from 3 Six to 6 Four. Everything would cook faster, so we could get them off the grill before things get jammed up.”

“Huuuuh? Counting on dripping oil to cook meat faster? That doesn’t make any sense! What are you supposed to do if the oil doesn’t drip? It’s a bad formation, simple as that.”

“You still don’t get it? I’m saying you should think about how the meats work in tandem and spread out the formation. Yeesh, no wonder journalists always say you focus on skirmishes but not the big picture.”

“Ohhh? Is that something someone who holds out so long in the late game that opponents get annoyed into making mistakes should be saying?”

“Well, I happened to win a title that way.”

“I have titles, remember? Two of them to be exact.”

“A title’s worth is measured in numbers.”

“True. But maybe you should say that once you have more than one.”

“Anyway, I’m going to work some worldly magic on that wasteful formation of yours!”

“This is my territory, got it? The Sora Zone. Reach beyond that line and I’ll knock you out.”

True to her word, she blocks my tong with her own as soon as I reach over the grill. Two tongs collide in the air like clashing blades as the real battle gets underway ……!

“The meat is ready, so I’ll get it off the grill, okay?”

Left out of our intense debate, Ai leans forward with her chopsticks at the ready and starts plucking the meat off the grill and onto smaller plates one by one before deploying new pieces onto the grill like pieces off a piece stand. She’s surprisingly good at rolling with the punches.

Then, she looks up at me with pleading eyes.

“Master. I’m so hungry (>-<)”

“Hm? Oh, sorry, sorry. Go ahead and eat.”

“Yaaay!” she says with glee and smacks her hands together.

Big Sis and I call a temporary truce to our never-ending debate, pick up chopsticks and dig in.

As for the flavor–––.

“Hnn! That’s good♪”

“…… Not half bad,” Big Sis mumbles, her face a blank slate.

She’s constantly going to inns and hotels all over Japan to defend her titles. Those places always use the best ingredients to serve top-of-the-line dishes, so Big Sis has a surprisingly good idea what fine dining tastes like for a girl in junior high school. If she says something is good, you can take that to the bank. I’d love to eat here again …… But, that just won’t happen ……

Just as I was bemoaning my fate and chewing the meat between my teeth, the cutest little squeal happens next to me.

“Owwchee!”

“Something wrong, Ai? Are you okay?”

“Too hooot ……”

“Hey, now, don’t burn your mouth. Let the meat cool off a bit before you eat it, okay?”

“I whill.”

It seems my apprentice has a sensitive tongue. So cute.

Keeping her promise, Ai starts blowing on the next piece with little puffs of air with a hint of desperation in her eyes. Cute. My apprentice is adorable.

Then, once the steam had died down, she timidly puts it in her mouth.

“And? Is it good?”

“Yep! ♡”

My apprentice looks up at me with a smile that could very well melt off her face at any moment and gives me a big nod. Her legs are swinging back and forth beneath the table like a happy puppy wagging its tail. So damn cute.

That smile is enough to keep me full for a long time.

I’ve always come to yakiniku restaurants determined to eat as many pieces of meat as I possibly could, but now I want my apprentice to have as many as she can handle.

“Alrighty! Keep that grill burning!!”

I roll my shoulders and pick up my tongs.

Some pieces of meat are ready, but they’re scattered among others that need more time on the grill.

To make matters worse, there are holes where meat was already taken off which is messing up the formation and the smoke coming off other pieces is making it hard to see.

But, it’s a pro’s job to sort through the chaos ……!

“Here we go! I’ll grill you up but good!!”

“Yaichi …… Was that supposed to be a pun like Static steaks? Do you think yakiniku is just some game? Your formation is literally burning up.”

“Don’t look now, Big Sis, but your loin at 8 Three is burnt to a crisp.”

“Promote. Promote it now.”

She means flip it over. 8 Three loin promotes.

Bursts of flame erupt from every corner of the grill. It’s time for lightning quick decisions. We follow the yakiniku standards to the letter in a furious round of give-and-take! Intense!!

“Eat this, Big Sis! Move-Loss Loin Exchange!”

“Naïve, Yaichi! Gutless yakiniku will never hold out.”

“Big Sis, all those mino cuts won’t protect …… Huh!! T-That’s–––a Mino Castle?!”

At some point during this back-and-forth, Ai starts frowning and looks up at the two of us with a very sour look in her eyes.

“It’s impolite to play with your food!!”

“S-Sorry ……”

“Whew. I was worried for a bit there, but we finished the job pretty nicely.”

“My tummy is sooo full (>-<)”

Ai gently rubs her bulging stomach as she makes the cutest little groan. She looks like a cute little toddler.

By the way, give the final shove in the Shogi world literally means to take down the opponent’s King. Generally speaking, it can also mean to finish what you start.

In this instance, it means to clean your plate. Back when I was a live-in apprentice, Keika always said, “Finish every bite, even what you don’t like.” Unfortunately, Big Sis would always shove whatever she didn’t like onto my plate.

“Man, that was good …… But, I’d like something else after all that meat.”

I open the menu and think for a bit.

“Alright, mixed veggies and chilled noodles should hit the spot. You want anything, Ai?”

“Umm ……………… Pudding, please!”

“Is it just me, or were you looking at my hair instead of the menu when you said that?”

There happened to be cold pudding on the menu anyway, so I order that. Capping off the meal with a cold treat sounds pretty good.

“Anything for you, Big Sis? There’s sherbet ice cream.”

“Three Mangalica porkchops. Pork liver, too.”

“Are you seriously ordering more meat?!”

“I should be the one asking you why you’re ordering vegetables at a yakiniku restaurant. Are you brain-dead? Go harvest some in the fields if you want a salad so bad.”

What are you, a kid?!

“Come on, Big Sis. Shouldn’t you have at least something green? Eating too much meat can take years off your life, you know?”

“Why should I care? I won’t live that long anyway.”

“Why is it only people who think like that end up living long lives? You’ll probably keep those titles ’til you’re past 70.”

“……”

She doesn’t say anything. Rather, she screams hurry up and order with her eyes.

Winning a verbal argument with Big Sis is impossible, so I summon our waitress and place the order. She must be a veteran because she replaces the wire grill with a fresh one at the same time.

The meat and mixed vegetables I ordered arrived after a few minutes. Pudding, too.

Meat for Big Sis. Veggies for me. Since our orders are as different as Go and Shogi, there’s no reason to fight. Peace has come to the grill.

…… Or, at least I thought so.

“Master, hey Master.” Ai, swinging her legs while chowing down on her frozen pudding (yummy♡), looks at the veggies I’m roasting on the grill and asks, “What do Shogi Senseis eat during their matches?”

“Well, all I can really say is everyone is different.”

Taking a spoonful of Ai’s pudding, I explain what pro Shogi players like to have on the menu.

“I’ve usually got so much nervous energy that I don’t eat much of anything for breakfast, lunch or dinner. Too much food at night makes me sleepy …… A few sugary snacks here and there give my brain enough nutrients to keep working.”

“Snacks♡”

“Delicious, aren’t they? The important thing is to efficiently replenish the sugar in your body. Sir Ayumu actually imports blood orange juice from overseas.”

“Oh, I see. No one gets sleepy drinking juice!”

I bet he’s not thinking that deep into it. Chances are he just liked the sound of the word blood and went with it.

“He and I are pretty similar, but there are some people who eat so much that you wonder if they’re going to be okay.”

“Playing Shogi can make you hungry.”

“I’ve seen players order extra chicken for their fried chicken set lunch, ate puffer fish stew the morning of a title match, order two set lunches for some reason …… Oh, and one person I know only eats curry.”

What’s more, they spend more than half of their match journals talking about curry so it’s hard to tell when they’re talking about Shogi.

“Big Sis. Why do you think they’re always getting curry?”

“Beats me. I think they said something about how all the spices keep the brain moving ……”

Yeah right.

“They’ve been observers for my title matches several times, but it’s such a pain because all I hear is try the curry, just try the curry over and over again ……”

“But Jinya Curry, I’d eat any day.”

Everyone in the Shogi world knows about Jinya Curry.

It’s a super special recipe that the famous Tsurumaki Onsen Hot Spring Spa in Kanagawa Prefecture only serves to players and association staff during title matches.

“But you need to be real careful ordering lunch during title matches. That’s important. Hotels and inns like to put their own spin on things so sometimes you’ll be going huh? when something completely different from what you ordered shows up.”

There’s nothing scarier than seeing “~~~ Style ~~~with sides” on the menu.

Looking at it like that, ordering curry all the time might not be a bad idea. Curry is curry no matter where you go. Obvious, sure, but that’s the most important thing.

“Big Sis, how do you decide what to order during title matches? Have any sure-fire suggestions?”

“Meat.”

That was fast. She never wavers.

“You’ve always loved meat, haven’t you, Big Sis? That’s why you grew up to be so aggressive …… Take a good look, Ai. This is what happens when you only eat meat, so make sure to eat your veggies, clear?” I say half-jokingly (which also means half of me is serious), but Big Sis didn’t take my joke as well as I thought she would.

“And you’ve grown up only eating greens, yes, Yaichi? Just like a little rabbit, remember? Put a perfectly good piece of meat in front of you … and nooooothing! You wouldn’t even touch it!!”

“What’s got you so worked up ……?”

That’s all I could say from under Big Sis’s overwhelmingly intimidating aura. Vegetables are good for you, so what’s the problem ……? I’ve been living on my own for a while now, so I’m trying to eat healthy ……

My apprentice looks up with a smile at Big Sis, who’s flaming bright like the pork chops on the grill, and says between bites of her pudding, “That’s because the meat didn’t look good.”

“Want a pike through your skull?!”

Big Sis tears into the grade school girl rivaling the pillars of flame bursting into the air with each drop of oil, but Ai isn’t fazed.

Pudding in one hand, she says with all the confidence in the world, “Younger meat is softer and more delicious. Older meat is harder to eat because it gets hard and smelly.”

“Huuuh? Maybe if it gets too old, but meat when it’s matured to just the right age is so much better than when it’s young. Everyone knows that.”

“That’s not true. The younger the meat, the juicier and more flavorful it is.”

“Clueless pipsqueaks should keep their mouths shut. Matured flavor reigns supreme. You think so too, right Yaichi?”

“Say what? M-me?!”

The flames are coming my way!!

“That’s not how it is, right Master? The younger the better is what you like, isn’t it? You said so before, didn’t you?”

“She doesn’t know what she’s talking about, Yaichi. After all, you’re not one of those lolicons, yes? You are normal, right?”

“Uhh …… what? Why do you bring up lolicons just now?”

“Just answer.”

They snap in unison, leaning into my face at the same time.

“Younger is better. Right, Master?”

“Matured is better. Yes, Yaichi?”

I’m cornered.

Young meat, or meat that’s mature.

………… I really don’t care either way ……

Huh? Whaat? I’ve never thought about meat being young. I just eat the meat that gets served, so how should I know how young it was?

But, judging by the serious looks in their eyes, I won’t be getting out of here without giving an answer.

“Well …… I guess matured would taste better, don’t you think? Even vegetables need time to grow, otherwise they’re too bitter.”

“!!”

In that moment, Big Sis’s face sparkles brighter than I’ve seen it in years, while Ai looks like she’s fallen into a hellish pit of despair.

Grinning from ear to ear, Big Sis snatches a piece of meat with the tongs.

“That’s absolutely right. Now, Yaichi, eat some meat. Take a bite out of a nice, mature piece of delicious meat.”

“Nah, I’ve had enough already–––.”

“I said eat.”

“Yes.”

I swallow the piece of fatty pork shoved into my mouth. I think I’m gonna puke ……

My apprentice follows up the attack, her eyes tearing up as she puts the nail in my coffin by screaming at the top of her lungs.

“Master, you dara! Big fat liar!! You just said younger is better!!”

“D-Did I?”

“You said that you would date younger!!”

“Say what?! Why would I ever go out with meat?!”

The heck is she talking about?! Grade schoolers have such wild imaginations!!

“Here, have more meat. Yaichi. More, more.”

“Master, you liar!! Cougar lover!!”

Big Sis is shoving meat I don’t want in my face while my apprentice is ranting just inches from my ear and the whole restaurant is staring right at us–––.

I’ve had enough yakiniku to last a lifetime!!