Chapter Twelve

Star Actress Yui

The next morning, Yuuki had arrived at school a bit earlier than usual. He sat down at his desk and decided to use the little extra time he had to conduct some research on the internet. Using his phone, he combined baffling searches such as “How to get my obsessive little sister off of me?” with interesting keywords such as “Compromise.” The loud thud of a bag dropping on the desk next to his interrupted his research.

He glanced to the side to see Yui angrily going through the motions of getting ready for class. Yuuki realized it didn’t bode well for him to see her so displeased first thing in the morning.

She pulled her chair back, grinding it loudly across the floor as she did. She overdid it just a bit, however, and the chair would have tipped over and clattered to the ground had she not caught it in a panic.

What exactly is she doing? Yuuki pondered to himself.

Yui cleared her throat nonchalantly and sat down at her desk as though nothing had happened, but the slight blush on her face told a different story. She turned to give Yuuki an accusatory glare, even though he was a mere spectator.

“What?” she said, her tone harsh. The silence stretched on for a moment before she spoke up again, “Yesterday was a lot of fun.”

It had slipped Yuuki’s mind that he’d met her at the station just yesterday. He’d been so preoccupied with Mina that he’d completely forgotten that he owed Yui an explanation as well.

“Your girlfriend is really cute,” Yui continued, sounding a bit more chipper than a few seconds prior. “I thought you told me you didn’t have one.”

“You got it all wrong. That was my little sister.”

“Wha—?! Y-Your...” Her voice trailed off, and she let out a peculiar cry. “L-Little sister? Well, she sure looked like she thought of you as more than just an older brother,” she continued stiffly.

“Doesn’t matter, she’s still my biological sister.”

“I-I have heard certain stories of people... doing that with their siblings, and,” she stumbled over her words and trailed off once again.

“I think you’re a little confused. She only said that because she thought you were two random strangers harassing me. She just wanted you to back off for my sake.”

“Ohh, so that’s what that was. Wow. I’m so sorry about how my sister acted.”

“It wasn’t just her.”

“Are you calling me a thirsty ho?!” Yui stood up in protest, her chair once again scraping across the already worn classroom floor. She then let out a disgruntled sigh before sitting down again.

Yuuki figured that was the end of that, but Yui apparently had other plans. She kept shooting him restless glances until she couldn’t help it anymore.

“So you went on a date with your cute little sister? That sounds really, really nice,” she said.

Not only was Yui being awfully persistent about the matter, but her choice of words was also bothering Yuuki. His day out with Mina was less of a date, and more akin to a babysitting mission.

“Don’t know about all that ‘cute’ stuff. She’s been going through a rebellious phase lately,” he grumbled. He then went on to explain to Yui about Mina’s recent odd behavior and how he was at a genuine loss on how to deal with her. Yui listened attentively, then nodded in admiration, as though she’d just realized something.

“Hmm, I see. It’s kinda refreshing seeing you like this.”

“What do you mean?”

“Y’know, like, seeing you mad at someone. You barely show any emotion. And this all comes from a good place since you care so much about your sister! It’s pretty heartwarming.”

“I wouldn’t say I’m actually mad or anything. I just don’t know what to do with her sometimes. She told me that she’ll only make friends at school if I get myself a girlfriend. Can you believe it?” he complained, folding his arms as he pondered on what to do.

“Hmm~? A girlfriend, huh? Hehe, I see,” she tittered as she glanced at Yuuki. “Funny you mention it, because my sister has been nagging me to get a boyfriend too...”

“Damn, guess we both got it rough.”

“Y-Yeah,” Yui responded as the conversation came to a sudden halt. She then busied herself with sorting the contents of her bag and the inside of her desk. Eventually, she stopped what she was doing midway, turned toward Yuuki, and declared that she had an idea.

“Let’s hear it,” Yuuki said.

“Come closer,” she instructed, looking around inconspicuously to ensure that the coast was clear before leaning in closer to Yuuki, cupping his ear with her hand, and whispering, “How about I pretend to be your girlfriend?” She chuckled cutely and leaned back away from him.

“What?” Yui’s suggestion was so abrupt, so completely inconceivable, that he just had to make sure he heard her correctly.

“What do you mean ‘what’? I can be your fake girlfriend in front of your sister.”

“... Yeah, let’s not.”

“But why not? It’s a great idea! And, and it’ll trick your little sister into netting herself some friends too!”

“I get that, but I think that may be a bit too much. And what do you even get out of it?” he asked. She must be planning something. As he’d suspected, Yui was clearly shaken by his question.

“U-Uh, Well, I’m, uh, just so worried about Mina! That’s all! If she’s anything like you, then she must definitely struggle with making new friends!”

“Hey, I have two people in my contacts list, for the record. Mina has zero. No joke.”

“You sound way too proud of a measly two contacts. I didn’t exactly have high hopes, but I had no idea the situation was this bad. I’m not one of those two contacts, am I? Oh, actually, hmm... Are you possibly getting cold feet? Is it because you want me to be your girlfriend for real? Pretend just ain’t enough for you?” she asked, finishing off with a deadly smile.

I knew she was up to something.

Mina was a handful, but Yui was certainly giving her a run for her money. Yuuki started to suspect that she might have more screws loose than he’d thought. There was no way a normal person would genuinely suggest being someone else’s fake lover, right?

This sounds like something out of a bad anime. But I guess I can’t just shut her down like that. It would be too cruel.

“You’re so helpless, Yui.”

“What’s with the condescending tone?”

“I get it, don’t you worry. We’ll do as you say.”

“Why do you sound like you’re the one indulging a spoiled brat?”

“Nah, you’re just imagining things. Thank you, Yui. You’re so kind and caring.”

“Wha—? Keep this up. See what happens,” Yui said menacingly.

Yuuki noticed that she was now holding the stone he’d given her as if it was a weapon. Things were about to get ugly, but Yuuki had an ace up his sleeve. All bad blood was subdued courtesy of his all-forgiving smile. This technique took a lot out of Yuuki, but its effects were immediate, as evidenced by Yui’s peculiar expression that was a mix of happiness and frustration.

“That settles it then!” Yui exclaimed joyfully, marking an end to that whole episode.

It’s gonna be tough handling both of these girls at the same time, Yuuki pondered. Now that we’re “dating,” I’m particularly worried about what this new little sister of mine will do in public. But she did say this was all for Mina, right? His thoughts quickly turned to self-assurance and pragmatism. Besides, this is killing two birds with one stone, isn’t it?

When classes had finished, Yui suggested striking while the iron was hot and formally introducing her to Mina at Yuuki’s apartment. The pair set some ground rules, which included deciding that the farce would only be in effect in front of Mina. As such, they left the school separately and only met up again in front of a convenience store nearby.

“S-Sorry to keep you waiting,” Yui said. She had her hand on her chest and looked to be having trouble breathing.

“What’s wrong?” Yuuki inquired.

“J-Just a little nervous,” she answered quietly.

Wonder where all that enthusiasm went, Yuuki thought. She had looked rather excited when she first came up with the idea, but he supposed she was now second-guessing herself now that they were actually going to go through with it. Turns out she’s the one with cold feet, after all. Yuuki felt that her change in attitude was so severe that it was possible that she also suffered from some kind of multiple personality disorder. Poor girl.

Yuuki grabbed her arm in a strange attempt to calm her down. “Here,” he said, “I’ll give you a handshake.”

“O-Oh, thank y—wait! Why a handshake of all things?!” she protested, violently jerking her arm away. Her face began to turn red as she stood there, awkwardly holding her own arm.

“My bad. But we’ll probably have to get used to it if we’re going to pretend that we’re a couple.”

“R-Right,” Yui faltered, stumbling over her words. Though she didn’t seem entirely convinced, she still brought her arm down and placed her hand in his. Yuuki could feel her whole arm twitch slightly and become stiff soon after. However, she eventually loosened up and squeezed his hand.

Her hands are so smooth and soft, he thought to himself. “You have beautiful hands.”

“I-I do? W-Well, uh, your fingers are so long and slim... They’re pretty attractive.”

“You think so?” he asked as he looked down at his hand. Yuuki reverted his attention back to Yui pretty quickly, since she looked rather suspicious. She had the faintest traces of a smile on her slightly blushed face, and her eyes were wandering around frantically.

“Whoa, you’re totally nailing this ‘flustered girlfriend on her first date’ act. You might be a natural.”

“O-Of course! V-Very convincing act, right?!”

“Yeah, that weird smile is a great touch.”

“I-I know! I’m a talented actress! You can call me Yui Jolie,” she boldly claimed.

Yuuki had been of the mind that anyone would have been able to see through their ruse, but Yui’s hidden talents roused some hope within him; perhaps it’d work surprisingly well in the end.

◆ ◇

“Welcome home, Master Yukkie!” Mina exclaimed.

Prior to his arrival, Mina had texted Yuuki instructing him to ring the intercom instead of simply unlocking the door himself. He was bewildered, but did as she said all the same. He didn’t know what to expect, but it certainly wasn’t Mina jumping at the doorway dressed in a bizarre white maid cap and matching white apron.

“I’m home,” Yuuki responded, taking a step to the side to reveal Yui, who stood right behind him.

As soon as Mina realized that he’d brought a guest, she opted for a hasty retreat. She turned her back to them and ran off deeper into the apartment, her brisk footsteps echoing from within.

Yuuki and his faux girlfriend were exposed to the sight of Mina’s usual skimpy outfit. This time, she wore nothing but a T-shirt and a pair of panties, and her apron had been short enough to only barely cover her panties from the front.

“What in the world is she wearing?!” shouted Yui. “Why doesn’t she have anything to cover her underwear?!” Yui was so surprised that she almost choked on her breath at the sight of Mina’s getup.

“She’s wearing a T-shirt at least. That’s something.”

“You can’t be serious! Does she always prance around the house naked like that?!” Yui stared at Yuuki with palpable disgust. Her death glare was so intense that she’d probably come to the conclusion that Yuuki forced his sister to talk and dress in that lewd way.

“I guess maids are pretty popular these days. Especially the ones that do the house chores and whatever,” Yuuki explained, doing his best to clear any strange misunderstandings Yui might’ve had.

Despite his best efforts, Yui continued to cast dubious glances at him. He tried not to think about it too hard as he showed her into the apartment and the living room proper. Mina, however, was nowhere to be found. Yuuki figured that she must’ve been really surprised by Yui’s sudden appearance, seeing as he didn’t tell her ahead of time.

“Give me a moment,” he said to Yui, urging her to sit on the sofa for the time being while he searched for Mina.

When he reached Mina’s room Yuuki noticed that her door was slightly ajar, along with a pair of curious eyes peeking through the gap. Their eyes met, and Mina immediately tried slamming the door shut. Her effort was wasted, as Yuuki was both faster and stronger than her; he was able to grab onto the knob and force the door open without any issues. As soon as he entered the room, Mina hurled herself at the door and leaned her back against it.

“Phew,” she heaved a sigh of relief, clearly hoping that nobody else would enter.

“Why did you try closing the door?” Yuuki asked. He noticed that she’d taken off the apron and was now wearing a pair of shorts along with her T-shirt. “So you can wear clothes like a normal person.”

“Hey! I’m not some kind of caveman!” she retorted.

“You sure about that?” he asked sarcastically. “We have a guest over. Come on out and say hello.”

Mina beckoned Yuuki over, so he dutifully crouched down to her level. She whispered softly in his ear, “Yukkie, you can’t just do that.”

“Do what?”

“Pay someone money to be your girlfriend.”

“It’s not a rental service. I’m not paying her anything.”

“Smells like a scam to me.”

“I’m telling you, it isn’t. That girl is my... girlfriend.”

“Your whaaa—?!” Mina yelped in confusion, wide-eyed and slack-jawed. The shock sent her reeling backwards, and she nearly lost her footing before dramatically freezing in place.

Is it really that surprising? Yuuki thought.

“Y-Your girlfriend?! Who exactly is your...” Her voice trailed off.

“You’ve already seen her. Remember that selfie you saw the other day?”

“The selfie? Hmm,” Mina pondered. She slowly opened her door back up and snuck closer to the living room to get a good look at their unexpected guest. “Ah! Is this Yui, maybe?”

Yuuki wondered if it had taken Mina so long to notice because Yui had been wearing such heavy makeup in the selfie, and because the impression she was giving off now was quite different.

“Oh no... it’s Yui in the flesh. What do I do?” she said flustered.

Yui turned to look at Mina with a forced smile and waved her hand. Mina had intended to be super stealthy, but apparently Yui could clearly see everything from where she sat, making the situation significantly more awkward for her.

“Oh crap! She just waved at me!” Mina cried.

“Yeah, yeah. Now let’s go introduce you to her,” Yuuki said, pushing her from behind. Mina, however, refused to move and braced her legs, so Yuuki ended up grabbing her arm and forcibly dragging her along.

“Are you sure she doesn’t bite?” Mina managed to whisper that terrified question into Yuuki’s ear despite standing right in front of him.

“Stay on your toes, soldier. She’s an unpredictable one,” Yuuki responded.

“I can hear everything, F-Y-I,” Yui interjected, glaring daggers at Yuuki. Her angry expression vanished almost instantly once she turned to look at Mina. Yui flashed a smile at Mina and spoke to her in a soft tone, dragging out her vowels all the while, “I won’t hurt you, see?”

Yuuki had the foresight to warn Yui in advance about how shy Mina could be around strangers, but it appeared that Mina’s behavior was no obstacle to Yui. She spoke to his sister in a coaxing, gentle manner that he’d never heard her use before, and she was so smiley that it was borderline creepy.

“You can think of me as a loving older sister! Your caring older sister Yui would never do anything to harm you,” she continued, still elongating her vowels and almost sounding like she was trying to convince herself more than Mina.

Wonder if she gets bullied by her own older sister or something, Yuuki thought to himself.

Mina was clearly still nervous, and her eyes were wandering around the room in an effort to avoid eye contact. “Um!” I h-have a question!” she finally declared with determination, seemingly having made her mind up and staring Yui directly in the eyes.

“Anything!” Yui responded.

“What color panties are you wearing right now?”

“... What did you just say to me?” Yui asked, the soft expression she had a moment ago now nowhere to be seen.

Mina awkwardly turned to face her brother and again whispered meekly into his ear, “I wanted to break the ice, but I think I messed it up, Yukkie.”

“What exactly were you thinking, Mina? And anyway, she’s probably wearing those white panties. With the ribbon.”

“Maybe I didn’t make myself clear when I warned you about sexual harassment,” Yui interjected once more. She was glaring at Yuuki like she was about to put some sort of vicious curse on him.

“I’m sorry on behalf of Yukkie. He says inappropriate things sometimes,” Mina said, inserting herself between the two of them and bowing her head apologetically.

“Throwing me under the bus the first chance you get, huh?”

“So does he pay you by the hour? Or is this a dare you were forced to do?” Mina abruptly inquired.

“Now you’re just doing it on purpose. I’ll say it again: Yui is my girlfriend,” Yuuki asserted.

“Umm, yeah, I’m Yui Takatsuki, and I’m Yuuki’s girlfriend. It’s nice to meet you.”

“Since when have you guys been a couple?” Mina asked in a puzzled tone, alternatively looking at her brother and Yui.

“Uhh... since today, I guess?” Yuuki responded.

“Today?! Which one of you confessed first then?”

“Well...” Yuuki faltered, turning to Yui for help.

“He was the one who confessed to me,” Yui answered confidently without a moment’s delay. Since this was all one big lie anyway, Yuuki didn’t particularly sweat the details. However, he did notice that Yui seemed particularly set on that specific part of their fake relationship.

“It was Yukkie who confessed? Really? Hmm. Oh, oh! Does this have something to do with those texts you guys were sending each other the other day?!”

“Nope,” Yuuki promptly refuted. He figured that Mina wouldn’t let him hear the end of it if she thought that her questionable texts were the catalyst for their brand-new relationship. Ultimately, he decided on denying it altogether, “Oh actually, speaking of those messages—”

“Th-Those texts had nothing to do with it! Nothing at all!” Yui suddenly interrupted. Yuuki wondered why her face was flushed, or why she had gotten so worked up about it. After all, those texts had actually been just between their sisters.

“So I guess Yukkie really did end up confessing, huh? How’d you break it to her?” Mina asked yet another dreadful question. Yuuki turned to Yui for help a second time. However, it appeared that he’d used up all of his lifelines, and Yui looked away from him.

Guess I’m on my own, he thought before saying, “I went up to her and said something along the lines of: ‘I love you, Yui. Please go out with me.’”

Out of the corner of his eye, Yuuki saw Yui do some esoteric gesture involving her chin and her hand. Clearly she was giving him some sort of sign, but he couldn’t understand what it meant. Unfortunately, the pair had failed to get their stories straight prior to meeting Mina.

“Oooh! And she accepted your confession right away?” Mina continued.

“Y-Yeah... He was pretty persistent, and eventually led to me giving in to his enthusiasm,“ Yui explained.

Yuuki didn’t exactly appreciate the fact she kept adding peculiar details about how exactly it happened. He suspected that she thought it made the story sound more believable, but whatever the case was, he was about to lay down the truth for Mina.

“So yeah. That’s how we ended up as a couple. I kept my part of the deal. Now it’s your turn. Make some friends, Mina,” he said.

“Hmm. I dunno if I believe it.”

“What’s so hard to believe?”

“Talk is cheap, Yukkie. I need to know if she’s worthy of being your girlfriend in terms of soul, skill, and body. So I’ll be testing her now,” Mina explained, then asked them to follow her. She never once looked at Yui when saying that, so Yuuki assumed that she still felt uncomfortable having a conversation with Yui.

“Sounds fun!” Yui exclaimed. She sounded willing, as opposed to a certain unamused Yuuki. Yui was in such a great mood, in fact, that she’d already followed Mina in a brisk trot before Yuuki had managed to register what was going on.

Where is she gonna lead us to? Yuuki wondered as he caught up with them. They had arrived in front of Mina’s room, and Mina flung open the door and pointed inside.

“I will test the purity of your heart first. In other words, I want to make sure there is no underlying darkness looming deep within your soul. Soyeahpleasecleanmyroomthanks,” Mina said.

Yuuki couldn’t for the life of him understand how cleaning her room was a good purity test. It had been a while since Yuuki had properly been in Mina’s room, and he was unpleasantly surprised by the amount of clutter and junk scattered about. There were dirty tissues everywhere, leftover candy dispersed atop the desk, some food scraps on the carpet, not to mention issues of manga and random magazines tossed onto every available surface. It was more mess than room at this point. Mina was obviously just trying to trick Yui into tidying up her room for her.

“You think you’re up for the task? Hehe,” Mina chuckled with her chest puffed out, apparently proud of her unclean room.

“This is nothing compared to my sister’s room,” Yui nonchalantly revealed, not showing even a hint of surprise while she looked around the space.

“Seriously?” Yuuki questioned, just as taken aback as his sister was.

“Yup. I just have to clean it, right?” Yui got to cleaning without so much as waiting for a response. Yuuki was impressed by how fast she was able to stuff all the garbage into a big plastic bag that Mina had so helpfully provided. “It’s best to tidy up books and such before we start to vacuum.”

It was apparent that she was used to cleaning, and before long, she had collected all the trash and piled up all the manga and magazines in one place. She noticed that she missed one that had been tucked under the table and squatted down to retrieve it.

“Oh, is that the The Fission Quintuplets? Are you into it, Mina?” Yui inquired.

“Y-Yeah, so?” Mina responded.

“Me too! I didn’t know the latest volume dropped!” Yui said excitedly.

Mina had just bought this volume yesterday. According to her, it was one of her favorites. She’d spoken very passionately about it on their way home yesterday, but since Yuuki hadn’t read it himself, all he could do was just nod along to whatever she said.

Mina was extremely timid by nature, but that often got thrown right out the window once she found someone she could chat about her hobbies with. Yui also remained engaged in the conversation, keeping true to her self-proclaimed title as the kind and caring older sister. They were having tons of fun as their lively discussion continued, so much so that the indifferent Yuuki himself wanted to take part in the action.

“So what’s it about?” he asked.

“Some guy wakes up one day to find that his little sister has split into five different people! I still haven’t finished it, but it’s pretty fun so far!” Yui explained.

“Very unrealistic. How can one brother take care of five rascals? Poor guy would die from exhaustion.”

“Hey, what’re you lookin’ at me for?!” Mina protested, whacking her brother on his shoulders with both hands.

Yuuki delved into deep thought for a moment and wondered what would become of him if that same blow was multiplied fivefold. I’d probably be plunged into the wall and end up severely and irreparably injured, he concluded.

“Don’t knock it ‘til you try it, Yukkie!” Mina admonished. She plucked a volume from the bookshelf and thrust it at Yuuki.

“Aww, I want to read one too. Can I?” Yui asked, pointing at the volume in her hand.

“Sure can! I’ll read it with you!” Mina happily agreed as they both took a seat on a cushion to read the latest volume together. “You start with that first volume, okay, Yukkie?”

Yuuki did as he was told and sat down to read the manga. They had long forgotten about cleaning Mina’s room and became immersed in a good reading session, as if they had just formed an impromptu manga reading club.

“Now then,” Mina declared after a while, slapping her manga volume shut, “let’s move on to the next test. Chosen One, now that I know your soul is pure, I need to ensure that your skills are honed. And by skills, I of course mean... cooking!” It looked as though she’d gotten so engrossed in reading that she’d totally forgotten about the trials that she’d meant to put Yui through. And so everybody returned to the living room again.

Mina concluded that anyone who could enjoy manga must possess a pure soul, bringing that portion of the test to an end. Besides, it appeared that bonding over manga worked surprisingly well as an ice-breaker; Mina was now able to look Yui in the face and speak to her directly.

“Right this way!” Mina continued, leading both Yuuki and Yui into the kitchen. Yuuki looked around the counter and found a plastic container of frozen rice in the process of defrosting. Next to it was a bowl with a number of eggs scattered around.

“Is ‘pigsty’ the theme of the day or something?” Yuuki asked upon witnessing the bizarre state of the kitchen.

“I was getting ready to whip up some omelet rice for you, Yukkie,” Mina answered. Her cooking repertoire was lacking, to say the least. Regardless of her prior plans, she proceeded to urge Yui to begin cooking using the pre-prepared ingredients.

“So you’re asking me to make us some omelet rice?” Yui asked.

“Yup! If that’s not too complicated for you, that is. Hehe,” Mina giggled.

“I think I’ll be fine,” Yui noted as she stood in the middle of the kitchen, examining the stove, frying pans, and so on. “Man, this is nothing like my kitchen.”

“No excuses allowed!” Mina declared with a chuckle, looking strangely confident.

“Can I use whatever is in the fridge?”

“Sure you can,” Mina responded. Her cynical tone clearly indicated that she was skeptical about the necessity of additional ingredients. It was just omelet rice, after all. Still, she folded her arms and judged Yui from behind her stern expression.

The rhythmic sound of the knife chopping away against the chopping board rang throughout the room shortly after, accompanied by the sizzling of cracked eggs thrown into the pan. The appetizing aroma of fried rice soon filled the kitchen, as well.

Yuuki and Mina sat around the table, mesmerized by Yui’s practiced motions. She looked dauntless when she flipped the contents of the pan, as if she’d done it countless times before. She was giving off a completely different impression than she did at school.

They must work her hard back at her home, Yuuki contemplated. He suspected that this was one of the reasons behind the negative aspects in her personality. He didn’t get much of a chance to go down this perilous train of thought, though, as the omelet rice was served right in front of him.

The dish looked exquisite, the steamy omelet adorned with a ketchup heart on top.

“I’m a pretty picky eater, just so you know,” Mina said rather too late. She carefully examined the dish from all sides and licked her lips in anticipation.

“No need to hold back! Dig right in!” Yui encouraged them with a smile from her spot right beside the siblings.

Mina scooped up a spoonful from the side, sniffing it cautiously. The smell must have convinced her, and she stuffed the whole thing into her mouth.

“It’s deli—” Mina clapped her palm to her mouth before she could finish the sentence. She then quietly chewed the food, swallowed it, and continued, “It’s okay. I guess.”

“Nice recovery, Mina. Very believable,” Yuuki quipped, impatiently snatching the spoon from his sister and taking his own bite of the dish.

Yuuki remembered the one Mina had made for him a few days ago that consisted only of eggs and plain rice and was drowned in ketchup. He was truly thankful that Yui’s dish utilized other ingredients such as onions and leftover sausages she’d found in the fridge. The omelet was cooked to perfection, looking soft and fluffy on the outside and melting in his mouth.

“This is amazing. I never expected it to taste so different from Mina’s,” Yuuki praised Yui without hesitation. Yui, for her part, looked quite happy that she impressed him and proudly held her head high.

“Of course it is! I get forced t—I mean, I cook all the time back home!” she quickly corrected herself.

Her strange slip up bothered Yuuki a bit, but as was typical for him, he chose not to dwell on it too much. What was important to him was that she was a proficient cook, just as the lunch box she’d given him a few days prior had suggested.

“Yeah, it tastes totally different than the one I made..." Mina marveled, whispering to herself after she’d taken the spoon back from Yuuki and eaten another bite.

“Don’t worry too much about it, Mina. It makes sense that’s the case, right? You haven’t been cooking as long as Yui has, after all,” Yuuki tried to reassure his seemingly dejected sister.

“I didn’t expect Yui to be such an omelet rice expert."

“Well, she doesn’t just make that. Do you remember those cookies we had the other day? Yui baked those, too.”

“Wha—? So your seatmate was Yui all along?”

“Yes.”

“Ye gods! Why haven’t ya told me of this before?!” she shouted, punching Yuuki’s shoulder, then darting up from her chair. She turned to Yui and gave her an excessively deep bow, “Your cookies were... rather delectable.”

“Aww, you think so? Glad you liked ‘em!”

“I shan’t forget their impeccable taste for aeons to come,” Mina proclaimed, cuddling closer to Yui. It was her own overblown way of telling Yui to make her some more.

“Uhh, we don’t have the ingredients for them back home right now, but I promise to make you more whenever I get my hands on them again!”

“Promise? Let’s goooo! Woo-hoo!” Mina celebrated, throwing her arms up in the air. Before she knew it, it appeared she had no choice but to accept that Yui had passed her “tests” with flying colors.

“So you done now, Mina?” Yuuki inquired.

“No, this promise has nothing to do with the test,” Mina backpedaled as she put some distance between Yui and herself. She was surprisingly persistent about this matter, folding her arms once again and having a serious face plastered on her face. “The last test is about your body. I think it’s pretty self-explanatory," her voice trailed off, and she paused dramatically. “I will check your body myself!” Her voice picked up again, and she pointed her finger at Yui.

“Wha—?” Yui gasped, bewildered.

Yui, who had remained unfazed throughout the previous tests and endured the litany of nonsense that Mina had thrown her way, was now frozen with her eyes bulging open. Mina appeared unbothered by this reaction, though, and seized the opportunity to feel around Yui’s palm.

“Whoa, it’s so smooth,” she praised.

Yui looked to Yuuki for help. Unfortunately, said help was far out of reach. Yuuki remained where he stood, moved by the fact that Mina was interacting with someone other than him without a hint of fear.

“Gah! Look at how Yukkie is judging us!” Mina exclaimed.

“Am not,” he refuted.

“Get your head outta the gutter! There’s nothing lewd happening here! Only science!” Mina valiantly declared.

She pulled Yui into her room by her hand. Yui did her best to resist, but her efforts were for naught. She was dragged out of sight as Yuuki looked on, overwhelming joy nearly bringing him to tears.

Eventually, Yuuki found the strength to move from his spot. He ambled over to the sofa and flicked on the TV. He relaxed for a short period before the girls returned to the living room. Mina wore a complicated expression, while Yui hung her head to hide her slightly flushed face. Another thing caught Yuuki’s attention; he noticed that the collar of Yui’s blouse was crooked, that her skirt was folded strangely in some places, and that her clothes in general looked somewhat disheveled.

“Waa..." Yui groaned.

“What’s wrong?” Yuuki inquired.

“I was touched..."

Yuuki had briefly wondered what they were up to when he’d heard some strange noises coming from Mina’s room, and now he had his answer. Despite this clearly scandalous revelation, Mina looked calm as ever. She made her way to the center of the living room and sat down without the slightest tinge of guilt on her face.

“I have finished my inspection. The results are...” Mina cut herself off midway, building up the tension and slowly looking at Yuuki and Yui’s faces in succession. “Bzzzzt, you failed!” she finished, pursing her lips and giving a dramatic thumbs down.

Yuuki and Yui’s eyes met before Yui turned to face Mina, her lips curled up in a wry smile.

“I-I failed? What did I do wrong?” Yui questioned.

“You passed, Yui! You’re a five star SSR character without a doubt!”

“Then why did you say that I failed the—”

“You didn’t! Yukkie did!” Mina explained, vigorously pointing her finger at her brother.

“How’s that even possible? You didn’t even test me,” he said.

“Hmm, how do I explain this... Yui is just too good for you.”

She’s definitely not wrong, he said to himself. Regardless of Yui’s occasionally eccentric behavior, she was still one of the most popular and beautiful girls at school. On top of that, she was strangely good at handling household chores, much to Yuuki’s surprise. Still, he settled upon keeping these thoughts to himself, because he’d risk her blowing a fuse otherwise.

“You know, I do honestly think we might not be the best match,” Yuuki said.

“R-Really? I-I disagree, personally," Yui mumbled.

Right, she’s a fantastic actress too, I guess. That’s another thing to add to her repertoire.

As it was, Yuuki was simply nothing but another guy who happened to sit next to her. Mina—who knew nothing of Yui’s reputation—objected and shook her head in disagreement.

“How should I put it... Like, somehow I can sense how much Yui loves you, Yukkie. But I don’t get the same feeling from you at all.”

“Y-You can sense that?! Th-That I love him?!” Yui panicked, her face reddening, and her eyes jutting to Yuuki and back.

“Hm?” Yuuki looked back at her, confused.

“Ah, I mean, yes, I guess you can sense, uh, that,” Yui stammered.

Yuuki figured that whatever Mina was talking about was merely a product of Yui’s impeccable acting skills. Of course, Yuuki himself couldn’t sense if love was in the air or anything of the sort, but he concluded that it was probably something that women understood about one another.

“Also, you guys feel too distant to be a couple,” Mina added.

While she probably didn’t mean it in the physical sense, it was still true that Yuuki and Yui were sitting three whole seats apart. Yuuki himself wasn’t exactly well-versed in how close couples should be sitting, but he still didn’t want to render all of Yui’s efforts meaningless.

“Nah, it’s all in your head,” he replied, taking matters into his own hands and scooting so close to Yui that they could almost rub shoulders. “How about this?”

“How about what?” Mina asked suspiciously, inciting him to do more.

“Umm, well then," he stumbled, desperately trying to come up with another couple-type behavior. He glanced at Yui next to him, but she looked just as baffled. He realized that they were going nowhere by simply staring at each other like this, so he tried the next best thing: he wrapped both of his arms around Yui’s shoulders.

“Eep!” Yui let out an odd yelp and twitched like a chill had run down her spine.

Maybe I went too far? Yuuki thought to himself. He noticed that her cheeks had turned a burning scarlet, but that ludicrous expression of hers made it difficult for him to judge if she was okay with this or not.

Her shoulders were soft to the touch, but there was something more pressing that stood out to him now that he was in such close proximity to her.

“You smell nice. Are you wearing perfume?” Yuuki questioned.

“N-No! I’m not," Yui timidly replied.

“You sure? Hm. Weird,” he said, continuing to sniff her.

Mina’s high-pitched shriek put an end to that uncomfortable show of intimacy between this faux couple.

“STAHP! No flirting in front of little sisters!”

“Hey, you asked for this, Mina,” Yuuki said.

“I didn’t ask you to turn into a gross perv!” Mina protested angrily. She then nudged her way between them, separating the two. Yuuki seemed shocked and hardly resisted. Apparently, being called an “old fart” by his little sister had done a number on him.

“What I meant was that, like, I want to know what you like about Yui, Yukkie,” Mina explained. It was a sensible question, and one that Yuuki had expected. Unfortunately, as before, he had failed to discuss it with Yui beforehand, so he was at a loss on how to answer.

He glanced at Yui to find that she was staring directly into his eyes and blinking rapidly. Clearly, she wanted him to pick up on something, and she was silently mouthing that thing at him. Being the veteran lip reader that he was, he was able to understand what she wanted him to say without a problem.

“I like her... buffalo wings!“

“My everything! Who are you calling a buffalo?!”

“Your everything, heh-heh,” he chuckled.

“Whatchu laughing at?” Yui probed, poking his shoulder. Yuuki just kept laughing, though. “No seriously, what’s so funny?! There’s no joke here!”

“It’s just kinda funny that you want me to love every little thing about you,” Yuuki responded.

“Th-That’s not what it is! I-It was something I thought up in the heat of the moment! You should’ve known that! Besides, you could’ve just said that you liked how cute and caring I am, smartypants!”

“Good idea. Okay, I like how cute and caring she is.”

“Wow, so convincing. How about we try again, but with actual emotion this time? For example, how do you feel when you’re with me?” Yui asked.

“Hmm. It’s fun being with you... I think?”

“Good, good. What else?”

Yuuki thought for a moment before saying, “I like how you’re pretty annoying?”

“You’re pretty annoying,” Yui coldly replied.

She didn’t like that last one, I suppose, Yuuki pondered. The “couple” would continue their quarrel until Mina—who had been watching silently—raised her arms in the air to stop them.

“Timeout, you two! That’s enough! I understand everything. You can stop now,” Mina said. Yuuki wasn’t sure what she meant, but was more nervous that his sister may have seen through their act.

“So it finally happened... Yukkie got himself a girlfriend. They grow up so fast,” Mina added, wiping a nonexistent tear from the corner of her eye.

“Spare me the drama. Now it’s your turn,” Yuuki admonished.

“My turn for what?”

“Your turn to make friends,” he replied, to which Mina rolled her eyes and averted her gaze. Yuuki was more than aware that she tended to be a sore loser, so he needed to make sure that she stuck to her word. “You said you’d do it ‘for realzies,’ remember? You can’t back out now.”

“S-Sure I do! Making friends is nothing. I could do it with my eyes closed!” she exclaimed, standing up.

“And where are you going?” Yuuki inquired.

“To the bathroom,” she said, leaving the living room in a hurry.

Yuuki let out a sigh of relief and smiled at Yui. “I had my doubts, but it looks like she bought it.”

“Well, you know, I think we look pretty natural, all things considered,” Yui responded.

“Yeah, all thanks to our own local Hollywood star.”

“It was a great performance, if I do say so myself!” she laughed away, clearly elated. Judging from the excitement in her voice, her mood had noticeably improved in the last few minutes.

I hope that this whole gag was enough to bring a positive change to Mina’s social life. Yuuki mulled things over in the back of his head while waiting on Mina, who didn’t appear to be returning from the bathroom anytime soon.

◆ ◇

Mina leaned heavily against the living room door. She could hear Yuuki and Yui’s faint laughter coming from behind it.

Yui is a good person. I know she won’t hurt Yukkie, she thought to herself. I’m so happy for you, Bro. She never anticipated that her brother would be able to get a girlfriend so quickly. She was undoubtedly fundamentally different from her precious older brother.

“We’re not alike. Not one bit,” Mina muttered in a fragile voice. She then closed her eyes and covered her ears in a feeble attempt to cut out the lively voices leaking through the cracks in the doorway.