22.

I rested my chin on my hands, gazing at his well-proportioned figure clad only in cream-colored trousers. Faint red marks on his broad back were visible, causing my face to flush as I stared at them, because I knew exactly where they came from.

"Here you go," Anwar turned around with a large chicken sandwich. His dark hair was
tousled, the typical look of someone who just woke up, but he still looked incredibly good, especially dressed like this and making breakfast for me.

"Thank you."

I slept in Anwar's room last night. The overwhelming awkwardness I felt initially was starting to fade, but it hadn't completely disappeared. Anwar propped himself up on his elbows before reaching for the sandwich, taking a large bite. He mumbled something about it being delicious and then turned back to pour milk into a glass.

Bing…

A notification sound went off, followed by a flurry of more notifications. The phone's owner quickly turned to check it. It was right in front of me. Just a glance was enough to see who was sending the messages and what they were saying, especially since the messages weren't long; it was more like a deliberate flood of notifications.

"God," Anwar frowned, scowling at the screen. He silenced the notifications and then flipped the screen down.

Less than a minute later, the messages were replaced by incoming calls. The phone rang incessantly until I finally spoke up.

"Seems urgent..."

His beautiful eyes darted up. "Not really."

"Aren't you going to answer them?" I raised an eyebrow slightly before taking another bite of my sandwich. He seemed thoughtful for a moment before shaking his head, a faint, almost hollow smile playing on his lips.

Those messages… they said things like "miss you," initiated casual conversations, emphasized how much they missed him again, and said they wanted to see him.

"I don't have time to talk right now," He let the phone continue to ring, ignoring it, and went back to eating his sandwich.

"Am I bothering you? About breakfast, I mean?"

"I can make time for the things I like." He didn't just say it; he looked deeply into my eyes. My heart skipped a beat almost instantly. I cleared my throat, took a sip of my milk to hide my embarrassment, and noticed a small smile at the corner of his mouth before he continued. "Besides, if they want my time… they'll have to wait."

"They seem to really like you," My words were a clear statement that I'd seen all the
messages, but Anwar didn't react in any particular way. He still had that small smile and stared at me calmly as he spoke.

"You can't accept everyone who likes you."

"I'm curious. Can I ask something?"

"Ask away."

I pursed my lips. Many questions I wanted to ask but never dared to. Now it seemed like a good opportunity, with the relaxed atmosphere and the timing. Anwar shifted slightly, looking at me as if waiting for my question.

"Have you ever had casual relationships with multiple people?"

He raised his eyebrows immediately upon hearing the question. His eyes glanced away before he lightly licked his lips. "Honestly? I’ve never even counted."

"Because there were too many to count?"

"Because counting makes everything seem strange, don't you think?" Anwar quickly
corrected my statement.

It probably was true... like those who count how many people they've had sex with.

"And have they ever confessed their love to you, or felt something more than friendship?"

"Some have. Why? Are you going to confess your love?" He teased cheerfully. He took
another bite; his sandwich was finished, as was the milk in his glass.

"No."

"Why do you want to know all this?"

"So, what do you do when someone confesses their love?" Anwar grabbed both our plates and placed them in the sink. "Have you ever... accepted their love?"

"Phoebe," his low voice greeted the chubby cream-colored cat that gracefully walked over, rubbed against his legs, before jumping onto the bar to groom itself.

"What do I do? Nothing. I've never accepted anyone's confession of love." The answer was simple, yet it made my heart sink for a second. Anwar scratched Phoebe's chin until she lifted her head proudly, closing her eyes contentedly.

I didn't know why I suddenly wanted to know all this about him. It was probably a desire to get to know him better, to understand what kind of person he is, what he thinks and feels about various things.

"Have you ever liked them?"

"I like everyone I spend time with. It would be strange if I didn't feel some sort of liking. But 'liking' isn't the same as 'love', is it?" Anwar continued to scratch Phoebe, moving his fingers from her cheek to her soft neck. "If you don't love someone, accepting their love wouldn't be
right, would it?"

"Hmm."

"Anything else you want to know?" I looked at his face to gauge his reaction. Seeing no
signs of annoyance or irritation, I continued.

"Have you ever had a lover?"

Anwar looked down at Phoebe. He was silent for a moment before answering simply, "Yes."

Something made me hesitate to ask further, perhaps the sudden indifference in his
expression or tone.

"Ask," he murmured softly.

"And with your lover, did you... love him?"

"Love... for a period of time," he slightly frowned before a wry smile appeared. "I still love him now, but it's just in a different form."

I couldn't bring myself to respond. It felt fragile, and because I couldn't read Anwar's mind, I didn't want to risk saying anything that might sound absurd. Anwar looked up at me, letting Phoebe jump off the bar and wander away.

It was intriguing, but I decided not to ask. I just wanted to know what it was like when
someone like Anwar loved someone. He already treated others very well. If one day he met someone he loved and wanted to be in a relationship with, would he end things with everyone he was casually seeing?

Could someone like Anwar be in a committed, monogamous relationship?

Seeing my silence, Anwar sighed softly. His warm hand rested on my head, stroking my hair a couple of times. "Are you full? Are you going anywhere tonight?"

"Oh, um… Chen texted me earlier. I think we're going to see a movie tonight." His hand paused mid-stroke before he pulled away. "I'm meeting him for a movie, and then we're going to Chen's restaurant afterwards."

I didn't know why I felt the need to explain further. I couldn't stop myself.

"Just the two of you?"

"Mm-hmm."

Anwar nodded slightly. "Have fun then."

"And you? Where are you going tonight?"

"I have a date. I'll be leaving soon. Where are you meeting Chen? If you're going out around the same time, I can give you a ride."

"I'm going to his apartment first…" Anwar's eyebrow twitched slightly. Looking again, his face was impassive, as if I'd imagined the twitch. "I can go myself. It's okay."

"What time is your meeting? I'll take you."

"Then let's leave together. And… are you coming back to sleep here tonight?"

"Do you want me to?" he countered, extending his hand. He interlaced our fingers as soon as I touched his hand, pulling me closer. "If someone wants me to, I will."

"It's up to you, then." I frowned, my heart pounding as if a switch had been flipped.

"Do you want me to come back?" he repeated softly, the question sounding almost seductive. Anwar touched the tip of his nose to my cheek, exhaling warm breath that tickled me.

"Yes,"

I replied in a soft voice, glancing at him as his smile widened. Then the final words slipped out, changing his expression completely.

"I want a kiss."

My face was lifted for a deep, passionate kiss that he devoured. Anwar kissed me until I felt flushed. His warm tongue teased mine gently before he trailed kisses down my chest through my loose t-shirt.

"Saying things like that, if I don't get it when I come back... you'll be in trouble."

..

..

"Come in, come in."

"I've checked the schedule you sent. It's still hours away," I stepped into the room, watching Chen busily collecting beer bottles from the floor around the sofa. "Where did everyone else go?"

"I don't know either. Everyone drank heavily last night. When I woke up, they were all gone,"

he replied, turning around. Once he'd cleared everything, he came and sat on the opposite sofa with a large bottle of water in his hand.

"Well, if we want to watch that, we'll have to wait until evening. Blue, have you eaten?"

"I have. Then let's wait until evening, okay? Are you anxious about anything?"

"Nothing today. So, we'll wait, right?" When I nodded, Chen rubbed his palms together. He was quiet for a moment, as if thinking, before looking up at me. "Want to watch a movie to kill time?"

"Sure."

Chen produced a box overflowing with DVDs. He left the Netflix screen open for me to choose.

"Are all of these yours?"

"Well… I mean, I used to collect movies. Now that we have Netflix, I don't really buy them anymore," he shyly scratched his nose, letting me choose a movie from amongst the hundreds without hurrying or offering any suggestions.

"How about this one? Have you seen it before?" I chose a title from Netflix. Chen raised an eyebrow slightly as he looked at the screen. It was an older film, several years old, but still discussed today because it was incredibly popular.

"You like biographical dramas?"

"Have you seen it, Chen?"

"I have, but I can watch it again." Chen leaned back against the sofa. He fixed his gaze on the screen. Once I started the movie, there was barely any conversation between us. The rich cinematography and melancholic soundtrack played continuously, contrasting with some of the intensely quiet and almost uncomfortable scenes. It wasn't surprising the film was so
famous. The lead actors were famous, very talented, and the production and script were excellent.

"He's totally disappeared, hasn't he? That actor," Chen glanced at me before returning his gaze to one of the lead actors on screen. "What was his name?"

"Ellis Gilmore. I don't know. I guess he probably quit acting."

"Such a shame. He was so good."
He had such a striking appearance, with long blond hair falling past his neck. The roles I'd seen him in before were always similar: wealthy, upper-class characters. In this movie, he played an aristocrat. His image really suited those types of roles.

"Hmm," Chen murmured.

After that, we were silent for the rest of the movie. I took a deep breath and hastily wiped away tears when the credits rolled. When I looked at Chen, I saw him chuckling softly.

"That's how biographical dramas are. Feeling down?"

"Man, that was heavy," I laughed, then we continued chatting about the movie for a while before moving on to books. Chen, like me, collected a lot of books. Unlike me, who doesn’t read very much and mostly goes to the cinema with friends.

"There are a lot of movies I haven't dared to watch because I love books so much, I'm afraid of being disappointed," Chen said, putting the book back on the shelf after showing me what he claimed was his favorite.

"I understand. One of my friends is like that. He refuses to watch Assassin's Creed."

Chen chuckled softly. "Speaking of that, I'm not much of a movie person either."

Time passed quickly. We left the apartment, riding Chen's large motorcycle to a cinema in Chelsea. The downcast mood from the movie we watched at home vanished completely thanks to an action-comedy. When we left the cinema, it was getting dark. We went to Chen's family's restaurant as planned. It was a medium-sized Thai restaurant, with a near-constant flow of customers. As soon as we entered, Chen's mother greeted us immediately.

The relaxed atmosphere, speaking Thai, and the food made it easy for me to unwind. It felt like we weren't in a foreign country, just visiting a friend's house. If you disregard the Thai music playing softly in the background.

Eight o'clock.

When we didn't know what to do, Alice texted, inviting us to go bowling. Chen seemed reluctant, but eventually agreed to invite me along. We left the restaurant and went to Bowlmor, which wasn't far away. We met Alice, Rome, Cole, and two of Cole's friends I'd never met before. After watching for a while, I was persuaded to try bowling. The heavy ball felt awkward in my hand. I ended my first bowling experience by spectacularly gutter-balling three times in a row.

Alice and Chen turned out to be the best players. We played in teams, and those two
somehow carried me to victory, much to Cole and Rome's chagrin.

We wandered around until eight o'clock before Chen offered to take me home on his motorcycle, while the others went on to continue drinking. Even though I could have stayed, I felt like going home more… maybe because I was tired from the whole day, and also because of something I'd said to someone.

"Thanks a lot, Chen. So, you're going to join them later?"

"Probably not. I'm going somewhere else," He checked his watch, then looked up and gave me a faint smile. "Well, I'm off then. See you later."

I waved to him lightly before turning back to my house. The lights on the second floor came on as soon as I flipped the switch. The silence around me indicated that no one else was home. Anwar's door was slightly ajar, revealing complete darkness inside.
He wasn't there.

I raised an eyebrow slightly, letting out a breath to dispel the little disappointment that was brewing. I went upstairs to shower, then brought my thin MacBook and textbooks downstairs to sit on the second-floor sofa. I studied ahead, interspersed with browsing the internet,
occasionally glancing at the time in the upper right corner of the screen.

"If you say that and you're not here when I get back…you'll be in big trouble."

It's almost midnight…

Who exactly isn't coming back?

..

..

Anwar's pov:

Boring.

The current situation is so boring that I want to disappear from here, but all I can do is pray that this work meeting ends quickly.

"Jennifer wants us to fly to Northern Ireland to shoot. The beach where they filmed Game of Thrones. We've talked to Vio, and they said if you agree to take the job, we'll start booking dates, flights, and accommodation right away. It's a great opportunity, isn't it?"

I glanced up at the speaker. Matthew was one of the people from the fashion brand where Jennifer is a director. Then I shifted my gaze to the blonde woman sitting across from me with her arms crossed. Helena hadn't said a word since we entered the room.

Since the night's party Jasper hosted at his house, where I rejected her…we haven't spoken.

Suddenly, my modeling agency contacted me and pressured me to come here.

"You never wanted to model for your mother's brand. Changed your mind?" I remarked calmly.

"I've changed my mind," she replied briefly. "Anyway, you were always her intended muse from the moment she took the position."

"Wouldn't Eric be more suitable for this brand than me? I've already said I want to focus on my studies."

And the conversation went round and round. Matthew kept trying to persuade me to accept the job, emphasizing how much Jennifer wants me as the model for the upcoming collection.

Everything now felt like a forced situation, a trap I was being pushed into. It made me
irritable, but rejecting a job from a major brand wasn't a good idea. In the end, my agency called, begging me to take the job because the brand refused to choose anyone else.

I should have known how stubborn Helena is.

My eventual agreement produced a small smile at the corner of her beautiful mouth. The tall, slender figure approached as we left the meeting room. My irritation grew when Jennifer invited me to dinner with the art team I'd be working with. Time crawled by until finally, it was just Helena and me left at the dinner table.

"Still angry?" her sweet voice asked.

"No, I've never been angry with you."

"Can we go back to how things were before?" I stared intently at her serene face.

"We can't go back to how things were because you expect more than I can give. Isn't that enough reason to stop?"

I sighed, trying to end the situation as clearly as possible, in a way that would cause her the least pain.

I've never liked or felt comfortable with this kind of situation, even though I've experienced it many times.

But trying to cut someone out always makes things difficult.

It was past midnight.

It took several hours to comfort Helena and reach an understanding. I drove her back to her condo before returning home, Helena's words echoing in my head:

"I hope one day you'll understand the feeling of loving someone so much you want to possess them, but can do nothing but watch them go off with someone else. I hope one day you'll understand how I feel right now."

I'm not angry with Helena for anything she said. I never want anyone to get hurt because of a relationship with me, but we agreed on everything clearly from the beginning. I don't want a serious relationship right now.

A girlfriend is one of the last types of relationships I want to get involved in.

As I climbed the stairs to the second floor, I made eye contact with someone sitting silently on the sofa. His legs were crossed, a Macbook resting on his lap.

"I told you to come back early," the words were uttered calmly, jarring a memory I'd forgotten since dealing with Helena that evening. The fatigue weighing on me made me want to shower and go straight to bed, but seeing the smaller figure still there, I dismissed that thought instantly, approaching him.

"Were you waiting for me?" I sat down beside him on the sofa, while he scooted closer to the inside. A faint scent of soap reached my nose.

Blue shook his head.

"I was watching a movie."

"Have you been watching for a long time? Aren't you tired?" Blue shook his head again, turning back to the movie on the screen without another word.

I couldn't tell if he was angry.

The atmosphere was tense, but Blue still answered me in a calm tone, without any hint of resentment or complaint.

"I was tied up with work. I'm sorry I'm late," I gently pulled his white legs onto my lap. I saw a hesitant expression on his face before Blue nodded slightly again and closed his laptop.

Seeing this, I picked it up and placed it on the coffee table.

"Why aren't you asleep yet?" Blue usually stayed up late, but tomorrow was Monday, and he'd been out since morning.

"I couldn't sleep, so I watched a movie. And I already told you I wanted a kiss," he averted his gaze in the latter part of the sentence, while I couldn't help but smile.

"Do you still want a kiss now?"

Blue didn't answer. He simply pursed his lips and then nodded slightly.

He surprised me. Most people would be sulking and demanding apologies by now.

I smiled slightly, tracing my finger along his soft hair. Teasingly, and with a lighter mood than before, I asked, "If you get kisses every day, will you get bored quickly?"

His slender eyes fixed on my face. "And will you get bored?"

"I don't know. What will we do then?" I teased. Blue paused for a moment before leaning over and straddling me. This close, his scent was even stronger. His slender fingers traced my jawline, then down to my chin and cheeks.

"I'll make sure I don't get bored, okay?"

"You know how to do that?"

Blue licked his lower lip. His soft body pressed closer, his nose brushing against my cheek, ear, and neck, before his lips lightly nipped at my skin, sending a shiver through me.

It wasn't like I hadn't experienced this before, but I couldn't explain why I was so excited.

Maybe it was because Blue always projected such a pure image. Even after we'd had sex
twice, I never thought he'd be this forward.

Soft kisses peppered my skin. I felt his sharp teeth graze my soft flesh. Warm lips nipped at my earlobe before lingering there, then moving to a slow, tender kiss. I tilted my head, helping him find a better angle. My hand moved to caress his slender legs peeking out from his shorts. The softness emptied my mind. The stress that had built up for hours vanished instantly.

Although I wanted to pull him down and take the lead, I wanted to see what he'd do next, so I restrained myself and let him continue kissing me.

"Hey!" Blue protested softly as I reached into his pants and squeezed his butt firmly. His slender body arched, giving me access to press a kiss to his chest.

Blue used both hands to push against my shoulders. His beautiful eyes met mine, a blush creeping up his fair cheeks, betraying his intense shyness despite his otherwise
expressionless face.

What a ridiculously cute person.

"Like just now? That's how we'll avoid boredom," I raised an eyebrow, watching Blue reach for a small ice cube from a nearby glass and put it in his mouth. I knew what he was going to do.

But my body still roared with anticipation when he pressed his lips to mine. His tongue, chilled by the ice, darted inside, teasing and licking mine slowly before picking up the pace.

Blue placed a hand on each of my cheeks, holding me as he moved his hands down to rest on my shoulders.

Then he pulled my hand to his lips, making my heart sink to my feet as his cool tongue
touched my fingers.

I unconsciously held my breath. The view of his body, and the way his butt pressed against my lap, automatically led my thoughts to sex.

And this hand-kissing, or finger-sucking, was doing anything but making me think better thoughts.

In just a short time, he's become this bold. I wonder if I've spoiled him.

"Blue," I murmured, my body already aroused just imagining what else he might be nibbling on. His dark eyes gazed at me as his full lips traced my fingers from base to tip. When he released me, I saw a glistening thread of saliva connecting us.

"Am I getting better?"

"Skilled." at both arousing me and using your mouth.

Blue flashed a small smile, clearly pleased with the compliment. He wrapped his arms around my neck and leaned in closer, kissing me affectionately again. It seemed that receiving praise gave him a newfound confidence. The little one playfully sucked on my tongue, teasingly alternating between being serious and lighthearted. When I moved in closer, he quickly pulled back, withdrawing his lips.

"Dare," he whispered close to my lips, and when I hesitated, he pressed in for another kiss, repeating the teasing game until my head spun.

Is it time to take charge?

"I’m getting sleepy, and you must be tired from returning to the building," Blue murmured softly, gradually loosening his grip on my hair. "Good night."

"Wait!" As soon as he said that, he slid off my lap, pretending he was going to walk back upstairs, but I hurried to grab him. "That’s so mean!"

I wrapped my arms around his slender waist loosely, intentionally pressing my body against his from behind. Then I leaned down to whisper in his soft ear, "You made a dare, why won’t you take responsibility?"

"I waited so long for you; you came back late."

"Are you really sleepy or are you just trying to punish me?" I asked in a teasing tone. Blue let out a light laugh before turning to face me.

"If I punish you, would it be effective?"

"You’ve been sitting on me for a while; don’t you know if it was effective or not?" I pressed closer, causing his face to flush again. Blue bit his lip as I pulled him in tighter.

"Want to sleep with me tonight?" Even I was surprised by my own question.

I didn’t think about it when I asked; I just knew I wanted to stay like this a little longer.

"If you don’t want to do anything, we can just cuddle." The smaller person seemed hesitant, and I didn’t want to pressure him, so I stood there watching until finally, Blue nodded.

"Mm-hmm."