Volume 4, Chapter 25 – Refina’s Past

“N-not at all. If I were in your shoes, Refina, I would have done the same.”

Yisi quickly waved her hands.

Refina looked up at Yisi for a moment, then her gaze fell again.

“May… may I ask about Master?”

“You mean Edith? She should be sleeping. I don’t know what she’s doing either.”

She had already activated the [Mind Control Immunity] barrier, so Edith shouldn’t be able to read her surface thoughts. Since she hadn’t appeared, it meant she was sleeping. Yisi didn’t know much about that aspect.

“I see…” Refina’s voice was almost inaudible. “If I were as strong as you, Miss Yisi, I could have been of more help to Master…”

“No, no, that’s not true.”

If she were to aim to be like her, it was sad to say, but Refina probably couldn’t reach that level in a lifetime.

The room once again fell silent, leaving only the sound of the rain outside. Yisi found a relatively clean spot next to Refina and sat down.

“Why do you want to help Edith so much, Refina? Although you call her Master, there isn’t actually a slave contract or anything like that, right? I don’t mean to sow discord or speak ill of Edith, I just want to ask why you’ve chosen to follow her to this extent.”

Refina was originally the daughter of a noble. Now that Edith had fallen from grace, she could have easily left her, returned to her original path, and lived a normal life. But the fact was, not only had Refina not abandoned her master, but she had become even more determined to help her.

After a long silence, Refina finally made a resolute expression. She shifted from sitting on the floor to kneeling, resting on her calves.

“Miss Yisi, can Master hear our conversation?”

“She probably can’t. She’s already asleep.”

Letting out a small sigh of relief, Refina’s shoulders slumped, and she began to speak in a very slow tone.

“Actually… I met Viel… that is, Master… much earlier than any of the other ‘pets’.”

“Viel?”

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She remembered that was Count Pescia’s nickname for Edith.

“Yes. The Viel of that time, while not exactly kind, wasn’t as fierce as she is now. To put it in perspective, she was like a blank sheet of paper, taking on the color of whatever she came into contact with.”

Refina’s gaze wasn’t on Yisi but straight ahead, as if she were reminiscing about the past.

“When she was hungry, she would casually drink the blood of the servants around her. But if she was admonished by Lord Farcia, the butler, she would know she had done something wrong and apologize sincerely.”

“But the memory I saw was that the first time you and Edith met, you were almost drained of your blood by her greed.”

“That was the story of when Viel and I met again. But for you to say that… I guess Viel really doesn’t remember me anymore.” A bitter smile appeared on Refina’s weary face.

“When Viel was very young, my father was a local finance official and had to report to the Count regularly. In order for me to make more connections, my father would also have me accompany him to the Count’s mansion. My first meeting with Viel was at that time.

I remember finding her in a drainage ditch in the garden. She had fallen asleep there to escape her studies. Viel’s wings were very small back then and could be hidden under her clothes, so I thought she was a servant of the mansion. Because we were very young and had no sense of class, we quickly got to know each other. Over time, we became like sisters. It might be hard for you to imagine Viel calling me ‘big sister’, Miss Yisi, but it really did happen back then.”

“Is that so…”

She hadn’t seen this part in Edith’s memories. Perhaps Edith had truly forgotten.

Refina continued her story.

“But later, at a banquet, my father, while drunk, offended the wife of a high-ranking noble. That noble found out and reported it to the Count. The Count not only stripped my father of his position but also demoted everyone else in our family to slaves. Of course, we were supposed to be executed. I later heard from Lord Farcia that it was because the still-young Viel pleaded for me that the Count spared our family’s lives.”

“If she pleaded for you, why did she forget you later?”

“Because a full five years passed in between. After being demoted to slaves, my father, mother, and I moved from place to place. My mother, as a former noblewoman, was often treated as a toy by filthy commoner men. Sometimes she was also required to offer her blood. But because of this, my mother received a treatment that was envied among the slaves. Not only did she not go hungry, but she could also live in a very warm house.”

What about Refina?

Although she wanted to ask, it was probably a past she didn’t want to recall, so Yisi didn’t ask.

“Compared to my mother, my father was not so lucky. Male blood was of low value, and he knew no magic and had poor physical strength. He could only do arithmetic, but no one would let a slave handle work related to money, as that would bring bad luck. So my worthless father had to do manual labor, going out at dusk and not returning until long after the sun rose the next day.

Less than half a year of that life passed, and my father became easily irritable and developed a drinking habit. While eating the food my mother had exchanged her body for, he would curse her for being unfaithful. Later, he would even forcibly take the blood he drank from my mother.”

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Refina paused for a moment, unconsciously clenching her fists.

“I had just turned 14 at that time. Because of my excellent magical talent, I was neither forced to exchange my body for food like my mother nor did I need to do manual labor like my father. I only had to go to a noble’s house every day to be a training partner for their children—that is, to fight with magic.

Although I had to lose to those noble children in the end and get beaten up by their magic, otherwise the noble would be displeased, which would damage the slave owner’s reputation and result in a severe beating for me, it was still a decent job for a slave.”

“My father saw this and set his sights on me. Although he still had some humanity left and didn’t do anything to me, he thought that if he could make my mother give birth to a few more like me, he might be able to exchange us to have the title of slave removed from him.

So he began to rape my mother day and night. Even when my mother had just finished work and returned to that dark and damp basement, he never let her go. But his calculations were soon proven wrong.”

A tragic smile appeared on Refina’s face.

“My mother died in less than half a year from exhaustion and heartbreak.”

“…And then?”

“Having completely lost hope, my father turned his attention to me. While saying that it was for both our sakes, that we could have more outstanding offspring and escape slavery, he brought that ugly face closer to me. I already knew what he was going to do at that time and had lost all hope in him. When he tried to take off my clothes, I killed him with magic. The cruelty I have now was probably inherited from that time.”

“…”

She couldn’t say anything. No one would commit patricide unless they had experienced disappointment after disappointment. Although she had never experienced such a desperate past, she could understand Refina’s feelings.

“After that, I was like a living corpse, just moving mechanically. At night, I would go to the noble’s house for magical combat. During the day, I would return to my cage and chew on tasteless food and foul-smelling blood that made me want to puke. I repeated this every day. I didn’t try to please outsiders to regain my freedom like other slaves, nor did I hope to become stronger and gain the appreciation of the army. Compared to an intelligent being, I was probably more like a lump of flesh.”

Letting out a long breath, Refina’s expression suddenly became relaxed.

“After three years—or maybe four—of that muddled time, I was suddenly asked to do something that was very strange to me at the time. I was made to change into light and airy clothes that I hadn’t worn in a long time, was bathed by two or three slaves, adorned with jewelry, and taken by carriage to the Count’s mansion. And there, I met Viel—no, I should say, Master, again.”

“Mm… I remember she saw you in a group of ‘food’ and almost drained you on the spot?”

“Perhaps so. I don’t remember much of what happened during that time. When I came to my senses, I had already become Master’s pet. Unlike the blank-slate Viel of five years ago, the Master five years later was full of a leader’s charisma: confident, decisive, proud, yet at the same time cruel, aloof, and even tyrannical. But I was drawn to that Master.

It wasn’t just a longing for a pure bloodline, but also admiration and dependence on her. Master always had her own ideas and would convey them to us, and we had to carry them out no matter what.

To me at that time, Master’s will to firmly believe in the path she walked was like the sun, making me feel inadequate, burning away the muddled, insignificant, insect-like me. Looking back now, my feelings for Master after that were probably like a bird’s dependence on its mother. I wanted to be controlled by her, longed for someone who could guide me.”

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As if to pour out all the pent-up emotions in her heart, Refina took a deep breath and then slowly exhaled. She turned her head to look at Yisi sitting beside her. Her purple hair, which had come loose at some point, brushed against Yisi’s hand, creating a tickling sensation.

“Just now, Miss Yisi, you asked me why I help Master to this extent. It’s because I admire her. I want to follow her forever, to always see her uncompromising and confident self. You probably have similar thoughts, don’t you, Miss Yisi? Anyone who has had contact with Master will feel her charm. It’s impossible to imagine her bowing her head, doing something that would damage her dignity and make people look down on her.”

“Mm…”

Yisi couldn’t help but lower her head. She had indeed felt Edith’s charm. Just like during the chess game, when she both hoped and didn’t hope that Edith would take back a move, she wanted to see Edith defeated and begging for mercy, but at the same time, she hoped that Edith wouldn’t let her down.

But compared to Edith, it was Refina’s conviction that made Yisi feel most inadequate. Compared to working hard to achieve some grand cause or for the vision of a group of people, a conviction like Refina’s, to follow someone to the death, was more likely to resonate with people.

If she didn’t greatly admire Edith, to the point where she couldn’t leave her, a point infinitely close to love, Refina would never have been injured time and time again for the count’s eldest daughter like she was now.

Compared to Edith’s dazzling, sun-like brilliance, Refina’s star-like light had a different kind of charm for Yisi. This act of being so weak yet stubbornly supporting Edith, making her shine even brighter, moved Yisi. Her desire to help Refina became even more urgent.

Inappropriately, Yisi straightened her upper body slightly and looked directly at Refina.

“Refina, I… I want to apologize to you.”

“Apologize?”

Refina tilted her head, as if in confusion.

Yisi swallowed.

“Before, outside Celtic City, when we were dealing with the empire’s Fallen, I impersonated Edith and did that to you…”

After knowing what kind of feelings Refina had for Edith, Yisi’s already existing guilt became even heavier, to the point where it could no longer be ignored.

After a short pause, Refina finally remembered what Yisi was talking about. Her whole body stiffened for a moment, then slowly relaxed, but she no longer looked at Yisi’s face.

“At that time, I willingly offered myself to you, Miss Yisi. You did not force me. In the end, it was my own fault for not being able to distinguish my master. Please forget about it, Miss Yisi.”

“Is that okay? I can offer some compensation… although it’s insignificant and I can’t undo my mistake.”

“If you really care, Miss Yisi, then please help Master more on my behalf… Master’s personality makes it easy for her to fall into disadvantageous situations, and the current situation is already very difficult to turn around. Although I don’t want to see Master defeated and admitting defeat, if possible, compared to her life, I want to let her get away from here, to a place where no one can find her, where she won’t be involved in war.”

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“How about you tell her directly?”

Refina shook her head.

“A pet like me, who knows Master’s thoughts, would surely be despised by her if I tried to persuade her. Master’s belief in the path she must walk is as firm as a believer’s faith in God. If someone were to say that the path she is on is wrong, it would be like insulting the god a believer worships in their face, and it would only invite Master’s contempt and banishment.”

“So you want me to persuade Edith for you? To get her to stay away from here, to escape the conflict.”

Seemingly having rested enough, Refina took out a ribbon from her storage and tied her loose purple hair into a side ponytail.

“I will not make such a request of you, Miss Yisi. I also know how unreasonable it would be to ask you to drive away the impostor for Master directly. You might be able to defeat Samael, but to face the impostor and Samael at the same time, while also dealing with the Tower of Pescia, which the Count can control at any time… even the first queen would only achieve a pyrrhic victory ¹ won at too great a cost to have been worthwhile for the victor .

I only hope that if things get to the point where Master is fighting alone, you will, regardless of her wishes, take her to a place without conflict, so that she no longer has to strive to inherit the burden of a ruler, and can go back to being that blank-slate girl and live a happy life.”

“Taking her away is not a problem, but making her a blank-slate girl is not something I can do… And what about you, Refina?”

“I will remain as the last person by Master’s side, fighting for her until the day death comes for me.”

Refina’s beautiful face was filled with determination. Yisi wanted to say something, but in the end, she only nodded grimly.

“…I accept your request.”

“Thank you very much, Miss Yisi.”

Standing up, Refina bowed deeply to Yisi.

The rain outside grew heavier, and the air was filled with the smell of water and dust.

“The rain seems to be getting heavier. Let’s go out after Camilla gets back. I remember you left over a hundred assassins in the outskirts, Refina. They might be of use to Edith.”

“Yes, and the other three pets are there as well.”

“Then let’s wait for Camilla to come back.”

Standing up from the ground, the somewhat heavy topic made Yisi let out a breath. She slowly walked to the door and looked up at the sky, which was covered in dark clouds.