Chapter 14 Confession

Chapter 14: Confession

Meng Wan followed closely behind Song Tingzhou. The two left the half-dead Tian Xing behind and descended the mountain in silence. Meng Wan’s mind was a whirl of thoughts, leaving him no time even for anger or fear.

The biggest issue he now faced was his chastity.

If merely speaking to a man outside the family required caution to avoid suspicion, then what of nearly having his body seen? Would that not count as a loss of chastity?

Even though Song Tingzhou knew Tian Xing hadn’t succeeded, being held and molested by a man outside the family like that was already a grave taboo in this era.

He’d already handed over the tofu recipe to Chang Jinhua. The Song family now earned more than a tael of silver each month from selling tofu, so they probably wouldn’t kick him out outright. There’d definitely be some friction, though. Maybe after this, Song Tingzhou won’t want to marry him?

Wouldn’t that be a blessing in disguise?

“I’m sorry.”

Meng Wan stared blankly at Song Tingzhou. Is he apologizing to me?

Song Tingzhou’s usually stern face now looked a bit flustered. He looked away from Meng Wan and said in a low voice, “It’s my fault. I didn’t give you a proper status, and that’s why you suffered such humiliation today.”

Meng Wan instinctively wanted to comfort him—after all, this was his master.

“It’s not your fault, it’s me…” But halfway through, he grew defiant. My ass! I’m the victim here. What’s it got to do with me? Is it my fault I’m good-looking?

Gritting his teeth, Meng Wan said, “It’s Tian Xing’s fault. Who would’ve thought a guy with such an honest face could pull something like this?” A wife-beater can’t be anything good.

Just thinking about him pissed Meng Wan off. Damn it, how dare he have the nerve to gross me out like that? If I don’t make Tian Xing pay, my name isn’t Meng!

“Either way, I won’t let this happen to you again, not unless I’m dead.” Song Tingzhou said this, looking down slightly and meeting Meng Wan’s eyes with a firm and earnest tone, as if he was carving the promise into his heart.

“Don’t talk about dying or anything…” Meng Wan hadn’t expected him to put it so strongly, and for some reason, it made him uneasy.

Could it be that Song Da Lang really likes him? From the sound of it, he actually plans to marry him. What should he do? Would he really have to go through with it?

When they got home, Chang Jinhua could tell something was off between them. She didn’t suspect that their neighbor Tian Xing had dared to molest Meng Wan; instead, she thought Song Tingzhou had upset him. But then she noticed her son’s face was even darker than Meng Wan’s, which confused her.

They sat down to eat silently. A spare rib landed in Meng Wan’s bowl. He glanced at Song Tingzhou beside him, then lowered his head to gnaw on the rib. After a moment, another piece appeared in his bowl.

Meng Wan’s mood, which had been sour, gradually improved as he chewed, finding the food surprisingly tasty.

“Auntie, I want more rice!”

“If you want more, get it yourself. Why call me?” Chang Jinhua said, baffled.

Song Tingzhou silently scooped another spoonful of rice into Meng Wan’s bowl and calmly explained to his mother, “His hands are greasy. It’s not convenient.”

Chang Jinhua looked at them. “Just now, Da Lang went to Zhao Mountain to find you…”

“Big Brother, what happened to you? Did you get into a fight?”

“Oh, my grandson~”

“Da Lang, which heartless bastard beat you like this!”

“Big Brother, tell us who it was, and Dad and I will go find him!”

“Get out of the way! Can’t you see your man’s been beaten black and blue? Standing there like a wooden post—go get a doctor!”

Sharp shouts and curses came from next door. The three at the Song family table each reacted differently.

Chang Jinhua frowned. “The eldest son of the Tian family next door got beaten?”

The two kids stayed quiet. Sensing something was off, Chang Jinhua pressed, “Da Lang, did you hit Tian Xing?”

Song Tingzhou put down his chopsticks and said flatly, “He wasn’t watching his step—and fell into a ditch.”

Meng Wan immediately backed him up. “That’s right, Big Brother and I saw it with our own eyes! He rolled down several times.”

Chang Jinhua looked at them suspiciously. “Then didn’t you help him up?”

Song Tingzhou let out a cold laugh. “None of my business.”

He rarely talked back to Chang Jinhua, so this remark was somewhat disrespectful.

Meng Wan knew Song Tingzhou’s anger wasn’t directed at Chang Jinhua. Afraid she might misunderstand, he quickly smoothed things over. “Auntie, didn’t you tell me to stay away from the Tian family? So we just ignored him.”

Chang Jinhua nearly laughed in exasperation at the two of them. “I told you to keep your distance from the Tians, but when have you ever listened?”

Meng Wan immediately raised his hand to swear. “I will, I swear I will from now on. If I ever deal with them again, I’ll…”

Another spare rib landed in his bowl, cutting him off.

Meng Wan muttered under his breath, “Enough, enough.”

Song Tingzhou withdrew his chopsticks and, with the mushroom gravy, polished off all the tofu on the table.

Next door, the commotion dragged on for a long time. Since they were close neighbors, Chang Jinhua couldn’t pretend she hadn’t heard. She counted out ten eggs from the kitchen cupboard and said, “You two stay put. I’m going next door to check on them.”

Meng Wan wanted to bathe, but with Chang Jinhua gone, being alone with Song Tingzhou felt awkward.

“Do you want to bathe? I’ll heat the water for you,” Song Tingzhou said abruptly.

Meng Wan shook his head. “I’ll do it myself later. Go read your book.”

Song Tingzhou wanted to spend more time with Meng Wan but feared making him uncomfortable, so he retreated to his own room.

After washing the dishes, Meng Wan sat on the doorstep. Winter was approaching, and the days were growing shorter.

A faint orange light flickered in Song Tingzhou’s small room. Meng Wan glanced over and couldn’t help but remind him, “Big Brother, the lamp’s too dim for your eyes. Get some rest early.”

“Mm,” Song Tingzhou replied softly.

Meng Wan turned his head back and looked up at the sky. The pitch-black night was dotted with stars, so close they seemed, some faintly twinkling.

He wrapped his arms around his knees. A cold wind blew against him, making him shrink. Burying his chin in his arms, Meng Wan stared blankly at the stars.

The nausea and fear were starting to set in. Recalling Tian Xing’s words, he realized that if Song Tingzhou hadn’t shown up, those words could have become reality—being locked up by the Tian family as a breeding tool. That beast, who didn’t even spare his own husband, would have made such a fate worse than death.

He couldn’t get cocky just because he’d received a modern education. Overestimating others’ morals and putting himself in danger like that was just stupid.

Chang Jinhua had warned him many times not to go there alone as a xiaoge. He’d been careless, forgetting his current status. Even in the law-abiding society he came from, there were still cases of left-behind children or women being violated by beasts.

Thinking of Zhu Ge’er, who had disappeared later, and Xiao Mei, who had broken their promise this morning, there was definitely something fishy about today’s events.

Meng Wan’s eyes flickered.

Oh, right, he’d also forgotten to thank Song Tingzhou.

“You child, aren’t you cold? What are you doing sitting at the door? Get inside.” Chang Jinhua returned from the Tian house next door, closed the main gate, and was startled to see Meng Wan sitting on the doorstep.

"Last time when Sixth Aunt's son, Dali, got married, you came to pick me up late at night at his place, so today I'll wait for you too."

Song Tingzhou, reading in the small room, heard these words. He fidgeted with the book in his hands and filed that away in his heart.

When Chang Jinhua got back, Meng Wan took a bath in the kitchen, then climbed into bed and said to her:

"Auntie, don't get up tomorrow morning. I'll prepare breakfast for Cousin."

Chang Jinhua grinned from behind the curtain. "That'd be great. I'll sleep in tomorrow too."

The next day, Meng Wan rose early to knead dough. He rolled the dough into big, thin sheets on the cutting board, scooped two spoonfuls of flour into a bowl, lit the stove, and melted a spoonful of lard in a big pot and poured it over the flour. Then he added two small spoonfuls of salt, stirred it evenly, and spread it over the dough sheets. He sprinkled a handful of chopped scallions on top, rolled it up, and rolled it flat again.

He had made plenty of dough, making six big flatbreads. Using the leftover oil in the pot, he slowly cooked them over low heat.

Song Tingzhou returned with freshly ground soybean milk. Seeing him busy, he quietly crouched by the stove to help tend the fire.

"Cousin, lower the flame."

"Mm."

Meng Wan stood by the pot with a spatula, flipping the flatbreads every so often.

"About yesterday—thanks for that."

Song Tingzhou, catching the unusual aroma from the pot, said calmly and steadily, "I scared you. I already told Mom that after New Year's, once I finish the prefectural exam in the city, no matter what happens, I'll marry you."

Meng Wan's spatula slipped and dropped right into the pot. His mind went blank, and he instinctively reached into the pot with his hand, but someone grabbed it mid-reach.

"Careful, you'll get burned."

A hot hand wrapped around his, and Song Tingzhou's deep voice seemed to whisper right in his ear.

Meng Wan yanked his hand back and turned away, refusing to look at him.

Song Tingzhou stood up and stepped back two paces. "Sorry, I crossed a line."

He washed his hands, slung his book bag over his shoulder, and got ready to head to the private school.

Meng Wan quickly used chopsticks to fish the spatula out of the pot, scooped out the cooked flatbreads one at a time, and wrapped them in a cloth bag. "Wait, you haven't eaten yet. Take the flatbreads with you on the road."

He'd made them specially for him; no way he was letting him go hungry.

Song Tingzhou, not caring about the heat, took one out. "I'll eat this on the way. You all keep the rest."

Meng Wan asked him, "Why? Don't you usually take six or seven to eat at school?"

"From now on, I'll come back in the evenings to eat and sleep here."

—

"Da Lang says he's coming back to sleep here at night?" When Chang Jinhua woke up, Meng Wan told her what Song Tingzhou had said.

"That's what Cousin said. He only took one of the flatbreads I made him," Meng Wan replied as he skillfully lit the fire, added the brine, and made tofu.

"That's weird. Usually, even when I ask him to come back, he won't."

The private school in town was small, mostly for local kids. Back when Chang Jinhua's late husband Song Youmin was still alive, Song Tingzhou lived with his grandparents in town to go to school. After Song Youmin died, the families stayed close until Song Tingzhou's grandfather also died of illness, and then his uncle and aunt kicked him out.

Those years of boarding—though they called it lodging—Song Youmin had sent plenty of money and grain to his in-laws. If he hadn't died, that money could've bought a small courtyard in town.

Chang Jinhua wiped at her eyes. "It's good he's back. Otherwise, with just us two women at home and all kinds of people in the village, it's always a worry without a man around."

In the past, Meng Wan would've brushed this off as idle chatter from Chang Jinhua, but after what he'd been through, he genuinely agreed. "Yeah."

The next yard started yelling again early in the morning, and Meng Wan remembered to ask Chang Jinhua, "Auntie, how are the neighbors next door?"

Chang Jinhua sighed. "They say Tian's eldest son slipped and fell into a ditch coming down the mountain. It was full of rocks, so he got all banged up. When I went over yesterday, the barefoot doctor from Red Village was already there. He said his leg was broken and there was internal damage, too. The doctor could only set the leg; for the internal stuff, he'd need to see a real doctor in town."

Meng Wan breathed a sigh of relief, figuring Tian Xing wouldn't dare spread that shameful story around.

He stayed home quietly, washing clothes and cleaning up the yard. In the morning, the Tian family borrowed the village chief's ox cart to take Tian Xing to town to see a doctor.

As the cart passed by the Song family's gate, Meng Wan didn't even look up. The customers buying tofu at the Song doorstep, though, watched and started gossiping behind his back.

"Who's that lying on the cart? Old Man Tian?"

"That old man's how old? If he's really on his last legs, they'd just buy a burial shroud, not haul him to town in an ox cart."

"It's Tian Xing."

"Tian Xing? What happened to him? Why's he lying up there?"

"His brother said he fell into a ditch while chopping wood up the mountain."

"Huh?"

These seasoned farmers, used to going up and down the mountain, had never heard of anyone falling into a ditch up there.

"Looks like he's hurt pretty badly. His mother and brother went with him."

"Why didn't his husband go?"

"That husband of his is like a mute. If he got to town, he probably wouldn't even ask anyone for directions."

Meng Wan listened expressionlessly, not pausing in his work. Winter was approaching, and the cabbages and turnips in the garden needed to be stored in the cellar to avoid frost damage—they were the main food for the winter.

"Wan Geer, leave twenty cabbages on top. I'll pickle them tomorrow," Chang Jinhua called out as she sat at the door selling tofu.

"Okay, Auntie," Meng Wan replied crisply.

The Song family's cellar was in a corner of the backyard, with a heavy wooden door on top.

Meng Wan moved the cleaned cabbages next to the cellar, waiting for Chang Jinhua to have time so they could carry them down together.

"Wan Geer."

The Song and Tian houses were built close together, with their back walls nearly touching.

Zhu Geer's voice still hadn't recovered, and his words came out hoarse and raspy.

Meng Wan ignored him and continued moving cabbages from the front garden to the backyard.

"Yesterday, I was the one who told your cousin where you were," Zhu Geer said, hope in his eyes, wanting Meng Wan to respond.

Meng Wan stacked the cabbages neatly on the ground and said sarcastically, "So what? You want me to thank you?"

Zhu Geer stammered, "No... no, I'm sorry, Wan Geer. He's been through so much too. He said once we have a child, he won't hit me anymore."

Zhu Geer stood on a wooden stump, watching Meng Wan work on the other side of the wall. Regardless of whether Meng Wan acknowledged him, he kept pouring out his heart. "I really feel for him. I've been married to him so long without a child, and I feel guilty. When he hits me, I just take it."

"But then things slowly changed. When the second brother got married, he hit me. When Xiao Mei was praised by my mother-in-law, he still hit me. Then when Xiao Mei got pregnant... that night, I really thought I was going to die. You saved my life!"