Chapter 27.

Harry's POV.

I've actually lost count of how many times I've sneezed till now- not that I actually care about it. I've a lot more things on my mind right now, and I can't even think clearly because of this stupid cold.

I let out a frustrated groan and threw myself on my bed, not caring to take off my shoes.

I pulled out the blanket beneath me and threw it over myself, curling beneath it.

I sighed and dig my face in the pillow.

But with so much going through my mind, I just couldn't relax like that.

I sat up in frustration and buried my face in my hands.

The feeling of guilt was freaking me out and I had no idea how to push it away. Of course I can't. I've already done the damage. And I can't get over it like that.

I sat there for I don't know how long, thinking about all that happened out there.

Why didn't I just say something good to her? Why did I have to say I don't want to rush into things! I hate myself.

She is probably still crying, and I'm feeling terrible over here.

Yes I like her, but not in the way Sasha does. I just believe she is a really nice girl.

A part of me wants to go back down there and talk to her, apologize to her. But the other part of me is not letting me do that. I don't know why am I so..scared.

I was snapped out of my thoughts with a knock on the door.

Who is it now.

I pushed myself out of my bed and walked up to the door slowly.

I brought my hand to the door knob and turned it to open the door.

"Hey Harry!", Zayn waved from the front.

"Hey.", I said plainly.

I opened the door so that Zayn could walk inside and then pushed it, closing it behind my back.

Zayn sat on the chair next to my study table and waited for me to grab a seat.

I walked up to my bed and lied down.

"So? What's up with you Harry?", Zayn asked me, sounding worried.

"I don't know Zayn. Everything's messed up.", I answered, since I couldn't hide anything from Zayn, and I didn't even want to try.

"Sasha told me."

"She did?"

Although I know Sasha would have told Zayn about it, I was a bit worried. Zayn is his brother, and he might as well hit me once or twice for hurting her like that. But seeing Zayn so calm and composed right now, I was in a disbelief.

"Yeah."

"How is she? Is she like..okay?", I asked him, and I could see Zayn quite pleased about me asking about her like that.

"I wouldn't say yes right now, but yeah Zara is there with her."

Hearing that, once again guilt rushed through me.

I didn't know what to say so I just nodded to him.

"Harry, you can talk to me about it.", Zayn gave me an assuring smile.

I think I should. Maybe I would feel a bit better then.

"Okay.", I sighed.

"Zayn I had no intentions of hurting her like that. Really."

"I know that Harry. I know you very well and I know you would never hurt someone on purpose.So continue?", Zayn said in a calm voice.

"Yeah", I took a deep breath.

"Zayn, first when Sasha was giving me lots of attention, I was a bit unsure. I mean I couldn't feel happy about it, because she's your sister and I thought what if I do anything wrong with her? Yeah you would kill me. I know that. I couldn't think of her in that manner you know? But today when we were out in the field, for practicing that song, I felt something inside me. For the very first time I felt something for her. And I don't know why did that happen. It was as if we were singing to each other, giving meaning to each and every word that came out of our mouths. But when she said she had feelings for me, I was caught off gaurd. I swear my mind stopped working. Words were stuck in my throat. I just couldn't bring them out. And when I gave her that shitty reply, that broke her heart. And I've felt guilty about it since that minute. I made that innocent girl cry Zayn. That guilt is just eating me up dude. I don't know what to do about it. I'm so god damn confused right now. A part of me wants me to go and talk to her. To apologize for what I said to her. But I don't know what's stopping me from doing that. I don't want to admit it, but I'm scared. I'm god damn scared."

"Harry, why are you scared?"

"I don't know man. I just don't know. I..I don't want to do the same thing to her that I did to Ellie.."

"Ellie?"

"My first girlfriend.", and I went into flashback.

"What happened with Ellie?", Zayn asked.

"Long story. But yea-", I sneezed.

"Harry where's your jacket? You're gonna get sick."

"It's in t-", I sneezed again.

Zayn left out a chuckle and I managed to complete my sentence, " It's in the closet on the right."

Zayn stood up from the chair and quickly walked up to my closet.

My head has started pounding, and I hit it a few times so that it would go away.

"Here.", Zayn said to me as he handed me the jacket.

I quickly wore it and wrapped the blanket around myself as well.

"You gave your sweatshirt to Sasha because she was cold right?"

I looked up at Zayn with his sudden rush of words and I nodded.

"You do care about her."

"I don't know.", I snapped.

"Yes you do. But yeah what about Ellie?", Zayn said.

"Yeah. In short we were in a relationship for an year. And when I had to come here for my studies, I broke up with her. I chose everything over Ellie. I was so god damn selfish and mean. I didn't even try to save our relationship. I broke her Zayn. And I don't want to hurt anyone else like that, ever."

"Harry.." , Zayn trailed off, as if processing all my words for a while and then spoke up again.

"Harry, you're actually letting your past come in your way now."

"I don't know. Maybe I'm too stubborn about it but I can't ruin someone's life again. Specially when it's Sasha."

"Harry! Just calm down man! Think about it. You're a nice guy Harry. You can never hurt anyone on purpose. Just give it a try. I don't say you guys get in a relationship. I'm just saying start from somewhere. And the reason why I'm saying this to you is I know you like her and care about her. Just give it a try dude.", Zayn explained.

But talking about Ellie and what I did to her only added up to my guilt. Everything came back to me. Her cries, her pleading to me, her sleepless nights which she spent crying over me, it all came back to me. Everything was fresh again.

No. I can't do anything like that Sasha.

"Zayn I don't think I can do that.", I said to him , a hint of anger in my voice.

"Harry please! Don't think I'm saying this to you because she's my sister and I want her to be happy so I want you guys to give it a try. I'm saying this also because you're my friend too. And I can't let you affect your present just because of some stupid mistakes in the past."

"Zayn please.", I was hoping he would stop talking about it now.

My head was pounding harder now and I felt feverish.

Great.

"Okay Harry. Just do what you want to do.", Zayn snapped and stood up from the chair, walking towards the door.

I wanted to stop him. But this headache was not letting me do anything reasonable right now. I guess it would be better if I just get some rest.

Zayn opened the door and shut it closed behind him as he left, leaving me all alone, drowning in guilt.

I heard the door open once again so I looked up towards it.

Zayn.

"And one more thing. Sasha told me to ask you if you needed any medicines 'cause you're gonna get sick. So if you need any, I've left them on the side table."

Before I could say anything, he shut closed the door.

Fuck!

(hey hey hey everyone!! :) Two updates in a day yay! ;) So what do you think about this sort of Zarry fight? ;) well my friend gave me this idea, so here it is! ;) hope you guys liked the chapter! :) Vote comment and Share please!! :) :) Every read, vote and comment means a lot to me guys! So thanku to each and every one of you who's been doing this for me! I love you all soo freaking much! :D So bbye for now! I'll update soon! xo)