EPISODE 3

LET’S GO TO JAPAN WITH THE ARCHBISHOP!

Saturday morning, six thirty AM.

A fancy car with tinted windows pulled to a stop in front of the Fuyukura household, and Ryouta stepped outside.

“Good morning, Alfoncina.”

“Let’s get going, shall we, Ryouta?”

“Yes, I hope you’ll go easy on me. Oh, I see you’re wearing a suit today.”

Alfoncina also had a purse with her, suggesting her VIP status. She also looked more grown-up than usual.

“I guess this is a very important mission…”

“It is, but work starts tomorrow. We’ll be entering Japan a day earlier, so we technically have the day off. You wouldn’t be able to buy your medicine if our schedule is too packed~. I just wanted to dress up as a cool older lady today! This outfit works in casual scenarios, too.”

“You’re right, I need to buy it today…”

He didn’t know where the traditional-medicine shop would be, but he doubted it’d be anywhere near where the meeting was going to take place.

“Yaaawn.” Alfoncina yawned sleepily. “See, I was so busy yesterday that I hardly slept. I’m so tired~. So sleepy.”

“I know you’ve been working hard.”

Between going to school, her job as the archbishop, and drawing a whole manga series, it was a wonder she had time for anything.

“Oh, I meant in an unable-to-sleep way, not in an erotic way.”

“I didn’t ask anything about that!”

“Make the right choices, Ryouta!” Shiren called, still in her pajamas. She had come out to see them off.

“I know. I’ll be home tomorrow. Make sure you lock all the doors and windows today.”

“I trust you, Ryouta. And this is proof.” Shiren dangled a key in front of her face, then stuck it into the collar around his neck. “I know it’d be embarrassing if you went back to Japan collared. This is just for the weekend.”

“Thanks…”

“But you’re still my minion. Don’t forget that…”

“Y-yeah…I know…”

“Heh-heh~. Ah, to be young again~.” Alfoncina was enjoying the scene.

“D-don’t make fun of us… There’s nothing weird going on here…”

“And remember your pledge, Alfoncina. I don’t care what you feel on the inside; keep to form. Don’t let it affect your actions.”

“You don’t trust me at all~. I am the archbishop, you know. I am essentially a politician.”

“Who trusts anything a politician says?” Shiren retorted. A surprisingly sound argument.

“All right, Ryouta, we don’t have much time, so let’s get going~.” Alfoncina took Ryouta’s arm. She generally had no objections to physical contact.

“All right. We’re off!”

“Mm, I’m still worried…,” Shiren sighed.

But the car left her worries in the dust.

“By the way, where do you have to go for tomorrow?” Ryouta hadn’t heard any details about the trip’s itinerary.

“Tokyo, of course.”

“Oh, yeah, that makes sense. Sometimes they hold summits in other regions, though.”

The capital city was the typical place for international negotiations.

“And we won’t have any VIP reception. I am essentially attending this meeting on my own, you know. I need your help carrying my luggage~.”

“Of course I’ll help. I’m going with you as your staff anyway.”

The car quickly reached the edge of the Empire. They entered the border office, handed over their documents to the Japanese official, and were quickly granted permission to enter.

They were guided to the exit on the other side. One more step and they would be in Japanese territory.

“Here we go, to Japan~!” Alfoncina put her feet together and jumped.

“Yeah, I had no idea I’d be coming back like this…”

They’d only gone a few kilometers as the crow flies, but there was something deeply emotive about it.

“There, our taxi is waiting for us already~. We’ll take it to the station, where we’ll go the rest of the way by Shinkansen.”

They managed to reach JR Oshiro Station without much trouble.

“Here, Ryouta, hold on to our tickets.” She handed him tickets for the first-class car.

“Wow, I should have expected we’d be riding fancy… I’ve never taken one before.”

“I do want us to have a comfortable journey~. Oh, and be careful of what you talk about.” Alfoncina leaned closer to Ryouta’s ear.

“Whoa! I hope you’re not biting me again!”

“Quiet.”

When she whispered to him, he had no choice but to stay quiet.

“See, it would mean trouble if people found out I was Sacred Blooded. So take care.”

“Oh, I get it.” Ryouta was not only in his home country, but also in an enemy country.

“But we’re off today. Let’s have fun!”

“Have fun?”

“Yes! This is my first time off in so long. I’ve been working nonstop for a while now~.”

“I guess you have a lot of work-related things to take care of.”

“Yes, YouRou IKou! has been positively backbreaking.”

“Oh, that’s what you mean!”

“Things have been awful in the lead-up to the anime adaptation… I think I’m rather confident I can fall asleep standing up now… Here we go~. Let’s go to the Shinkansen platform~.”

They then boarded the Nozomi express train and sank into the plush seats, with Ryouta by the aisle and Alfoncina by the window.

“Ah, we’re on an N700 series train~.”

“I’m surprised you can tell,” Ryouta commented. “I haven’t ridden the Shinkansen in a really long time. I’ve never been to Tokyo, either.”

“I see~. But Tokyo is so much fun~. Is there a reason why? I suppose high school students don’t have a reason to go. It is quite expensive~.”

“If I went somewhere with that many people…my curse…”

Just thinking about it made him shiver.

“Ah, right~. That was your curse.”

Because of his grandfather’s curse, Ryouta was so attractive to human women that it drove them mad—he’d been nearly kidnapped on multiple occasions.

“It has no effect on the Sacred Blooded, so I can live peacefully in the Empire.”

“Peacefully?” Alfoncina asked genuinely.

“I guess I mean…peaceful may not really be the right word… I won’t deny that.” He had almost died a few days ago. “But there’s an electricity in the air here that isn’t in the Empire. Even when we were at the station just now, I saw people glancing at me… I doubted I was going to get attacked or anything, though…”

“Oh, I did notice the stares. I suppose that’s your doing~.”

“If you weren’t here, I’d have so many people coming after me already.”

“Gosh, imagine how cruel that would be to say to someone ugly,” Alfoncina chirped. That certainly was an addition to this conversation.

“But it’s true. I think you’ll start to see it for yourself very soon…”

A few minutes later, the snack cart and vendor entered their car. “Lunch boxes, drinks, unique Shinkansen sweets, all for sale~.”

“Oh, Ryouta, do you want anything?”

“No, I’ll buy something myself if I really need anything. I put a lot in my wallet just in case.”

“But you didn’t bring any Japanese yen, did you?”

“Oops.”

The currency of the Sacred Blood Empire was just Japanese yen with “SACRED YEN” written on it in marker.

“…I guess I could use it, but it would be embarrassing.”

Then the snack vendor came to stop in front of Ryouta, apparently sensing that he wanted something. She was in her twenties.

“Would you like anything?”

“I don’t think I’m going to get—”

“Then please have this coffee, on the house. And this soda, on the house. And this lunch set, on the house. And this ice cream, on the house.” She pulled out all the things in rapid succession.

“Uh…I’m not really going to buy anything…”

“It’s fine, everything’s on the house. Huff, huff…” Her eyes were turning red. “And here, a smile on the house! Tee-hee!”

“Th-thanks… Um, you’re blocking the aisle, so I think you should go now…”

“And please have my number, on the hou—”

“No thanks!”

“So this is your curse~,” Alfoncina remarked, somewhat taken aback by the scene.

The woman hadn’t tried anything else, so he came away from the incident with a free lunch. Unfortunately, this food had come with nausea and guilt, so he didn’t consider himself all that lucky.

“That’s how it normally is. Isn’t it weird…?”

“You’re right. It’s quite a high-level phenomenon. I’d say curse is an apt word for it~.”

“It really sucked. Even my family came after me…”

He wasn’t particularly fond of the memories this was dredging up. And there were way more than just one or two of those.

“I suppose you couldn’t find genuine love here in Japan like that. Poor thing~.”

“You’re right. Oh—”

There had been one exception: Ouka Sarano. She was immune, so they had been regular friends. Ryouta guessed that was why he’d been so attracted to her.

“Oh~? That tells me you must have had a crush on someone~.” Alfoncina smiled gleefully, as though she’d discovered his weak point.

“W-well, yeah, I am a boy. I’ve at least had that experience, of course…”

“Hmmm. Would that someone be Ouka Sarano~?” She found him out right away.

“Wh-why did you think of her…?”

“If I had to say, I’d call it a woman’s instinct~. No one would have told me personally or anything. There’s nothing to tell~.”

“Well, the way you’re phrasing that definitely makes it sound like you heard it from someone… It’s not like anyone else knows…”

He was sure the only person he’d told in the Empire was Shiren. But it was hard to imagine Shiren blabbing about it to anyone else.

Who else was there? It was hard for him to come up with a list.

Did I ever let Ouka know? No, wait, that would be weird. It wasn’t like I told her I had a crush on her in elementary school or anything. And she transferred not too long after that…

“Oh, isn’t it just so funny when buttons are one place off their proper holes~? I wonder what will happen~.”

“Uh, why do you look like you know the truth…?”

“No reason. It’s fine; the past doesn’t matter~.”

“I guess you’re right; it did happen a long time ago. Thinking back, I must have thought Ouka was so special because she was the only one unaffected by my curse…”

Of course, she would have seemed different; she was Sacred Blooded. Maybe he’d mistaken that feeling for a crush. Or if it was love, then his unique environment had fanned the flames even higher.

A part of him felt some measure of guilt about that.

“You could say that~. Who is it you like now, then?” she prodded, although he really didn’t want to go there.

“Yeah, good question…” He always made sure not to think too hard about it.

“Who is it~? Tell me~. There are so many girls around you~.”

“As of right now, I haven’t decided. I don’t have time to get wrapped up in romance or whatever…”

“What about Shiren? You live together~.”

“I know people get the wrong idea sometimes, but there really is nothing between us.”

“You seem close with Tamaki. You’re in the same class.”

“Well, you know… We’re not dating or anything; we’re just friends…” She did end up drinking some of his blood, but nothing had gone beyond that.

“How was your date with Sasara~?”

“That was honestly just a diversionary tactic to help Sasara… There really isn’t anything between us…”

They ultimately managed to put off the deadline for her to choose a marriage partner.

That was when he got a text.

He deleted it without reading the rest.

“I know there’s a lot of noise in the data, but basically, I don’t have anyone right now.”

“I see~. There’s no one~.”

He had a feeling he’d just handed her a weakness to exploit.

“Well, I am in desperate need of sleep, so I am going to get some shut-eye~.” Alfoncina yawned again.

“Oh, sure. I know you’re exhausted.”

Ryouta relaxed slightly, knowing Alfoncina wasn’t going to be teasing him.

“Oh~. And one word of warning~,” she said with a smile. “I’m usually very smiley, but when I’m woken up during my sleep, I get into a very bad mood. So please don’t wake me unless it’s an emergency, okay~? :)”

“O-okay…”

“In the past, I followed you because some people were joking that you were part of the Virginal Father~. This is how I looked then~.”

Her face suddenly filled with hatred strong enough to kill a small fuzzy creature on sight.

Ryouta thought of demons, or the villain of a battle manga.

And then her expression immediately transformed back into a smile.

“When they see me like this, the people at the cathedral tell one another to stay away from me because they don’t know what I’m going to do to them~. When I’ve just woken up, stopping me with logic doesn’t really help at all~. So don’t wake me up, okay~?” She smiled.

“All right…I won’t wake you up… That was terrifying… It really doesn’t suit you…”

“Oh, you know how sometimes, the characters’ faces in YouRou IKou! suddenly turn realistic? This was the inspiration for it~.”

“I really wasn’t expecting a behind-the-scenes peek!”

“All right then, night night~.” Alfoncina leaned toward the window slightly and closed her eyes. “Zzz, zzz…”

After about two minutes, she’d fallen asleep.

People who worked all the time would pass out in the trains.

She’s sleeping soundly. Maybe this is the time for me to use the bathroom.

Now that he was thinking about it, he hadn’t gone at all since leaving the house this morning, and he was feeling the urge to pee.

But then—

—Alfoncina leaned over to rest on his shoulder.

“Zzz, zzz… Zzz…”

The train had tilted slightly to the side and shifted her over.

She’s not doing this on purpose, is she? She’s just sleeping.

She was way too limp for her to be pretending, so she was probably genuinely asleep.

“Zzz, zzz…”

Her breath tickled his arm, which briefly startled him. When he realized it was just her, though, he held still.

This is embarrassing, but I’ll power through it… I know she doesn’t mean anything bad by it. And she said it’d be bad if I wake her…

Plop.

Alfoncina fell forward onto his lap.

She always has me around her finger, but right now, she seems almost helpless…

Her elder, more mature aura was totally gone now that she was asleep. Her face and shoulders appeared smaller than his own.

There was a sheen to her hair that made him wonder just how much time she spent taking care of it.

Oh no, I’m getting nervous…

He scarcely remembered it, but she had once leaned over him like this before, and he’d questioned if she was going to drink his blood. This situation made him uneasy.

I wonder how she did it before… No, stop thinking about that stuff!

He mentally collected himself so that his imagination wouldn’t take off in any weird directions.

“Zzz… Ryouta, Ryouta…”

For a second, he thought she’d woken up, but she was just talking in her sleep.

“Ryouta… So…big…”

“Pffft!”

It didn’t sound like she was talking in her sleep, and he almost spat out his drink.

Wh-what kind of dream is she having…? This is bad—this is really bad! I almost woke her up…

“It’s so big… Skytree…”

Oh, she means the Skytree… I thought she was going to say something sexual to me again…

“Ryouta… So sharp… How inappropriate…”

He jumped again.

I really hope she isn’t having any weird dreams right now…

And she was whispering all this from his lap, which made it worse.

“Akiba is such a sharp little city… There are so many porn shops; how inappropriate… Zzz, zzz…”

Oh, yeah! Akiba is the cutting edge of our generation! I think she’s exactly right! I was getting the wrong idea, but maybe this is my fault…? Is there something wrong with Alfoncina…?

“Zzz… Ryouta… So full… Going to burst…”

He jumped again.

Calm down, calm down… There are a lot of things in this world that can be full…

“Zzz… The train going from Shinagawa to Kamata on the Keihin-Tohoku Line is at capacity. I think it’s going to burst… Zzz…”

What, does she live there?! I doubt she’s ever lived next to a train line!

“I knew it; it’d be easier for people living in Tsurumi to use the Tokaido Line until Kawasaki, and then transfer from there… Zzz, zzz…”

She’s being so specific with her sleep-talking…

“Zzz, zzz… Ryouta, don’t lick there… So dirty…”

This has to be unrelated… Just ignore it, just ignore it…

“Zzz, zzz… Oh, stop it… Everyone’s watching…”

Okay, okay, just drop the punch line already…

Impossible things sometimes took place in people’s dreams. But he couldn’t completely rule out the chance that she was having an indecent dream.

The unease in him slowly grew.

“Gosh… You’re like a dog, Ryouta… With all that licking…”

What on Earth is dream-me licking…? Not people, right? Right…?

“You can’t do a tour of all twenty-three wards of Tokyo by licking the roads along the way! Zzz…”

What kind of dream is that?! he mentally snapped at her.

“Look, there’s gum stuck to it. Oh, I suppose that’s all right. Zzz…”

Dream-me sure is innovative…

Even though it was just a dream, he wished his dream self would have a bit more restraint.

At least let me complain out loud… This is really stressing me out…

And there was another element to this situation.

He needed to go to the bathroom. If he got up to leave, then he would have to move her head, which had a great chance of waking Alfoncina up.

I can still hold it, I can still hold it… I don’t think we’ll be on the Shinkansen for very long anyway…and when we stop at Nagoya, she’ll wake up from the sound of people getting on and off the train. Then I can go…

“We have an announcement for our customers. Due to the strong winds blowing on the tracks, we are traveling at a reduced speed. We estimate our arrival into Nagoya Station will be about ten minutes behind schedule. We apologize for this inconvenience in your travels.”

Now?!

Ryouta felt like luck had simply abandoned him on this day.

“Zzz, zzz… Oh, Ryouta, you wet yourself. How dirty…”

Seriously, what kind of dream is she having?!

“Oh, you always do baby play with Shiren, so you do this sort of thing a lot? But you need to be aware that most will see you as utterly depraved, and that it will have you lose all trust from the whole of society, okay? I don’t think we can recover from this. Zzz…”

What on Earth is she dreaming about?! You can’t just say whatever because you’re asleep!

“What…? You want me to lick it? I can’t do that, Ryouta…”

Come on, Dream Ryouta, don’t make her do weird stuff!

“You’ll pay me a hundred thousand yen? I told you, no… You’re a deviant, Ryouta…”

Die, Dream Ryouta! Just die already!

“If you want, then you should lick it instead. Oh, you really will do it… That is gross; please don’t…”

Die! I literally don’t care if there’s proper buildup—just have a fit or whatever and die, Ryouta! You have to, for my dignity!

Dream Ryouta was very quickly losing the right to exist. He was discovering rock bottom and still digging.

At some point, the urge to go to the bathroom came to the front of his mind.

What should I do…?

“Zzz, zzz… Did you know, Ryouta? That if you hold your pee for too long, you can get kidney stones more easily…? Zzz, zzz…”

Oh, sounds like her dream changed course, thankfully…

“I’ve heard that stones are among the most painful ailments you can have, and even female patients have said they’re more painful than giving birth. Isn’t that scary? Zzz, zzz…”

Then let me go to the bathroom, please!

“I see, even with kidney stones, you still want to be by Shiren’s side right now. How suave of you, Ryouta…”

No, there’s nothing suave about that at all! What on Earth is going on in her dream anyway?!

“Zzz… By the way, who is it you really love, Ryouta?”

Her dream had changed into something mean-spirited again.

“What, Shiren was just a toy for you? You’d never want a brat like her? You should be more prudent about your word choice…”

I’m turning into a villain!

“And Tamaki was a toy, too? It’s easy to trick unfortunate girls with a little scrap of kindness? What did I tell you about choosing your words…?!”

It sounds like I’m turning into the enemy of all women here…

“And the same for Sasara? Prideful women are easy to drop because they haven’t lost their naïveté? How awful of you, Ryouta. I wish I could execute you myself right this instant…”

He’s just asking for death now, huh?!

“And ultimately, you’re marrying Ouka in a bid for power…making cute girls wait on you hand and foot…? You are heartless, through and through. Would you make me submit then, too? I think I would rather die at that point…”

Why is she having a dream like this…? Does she think I’m an awful person way deep down?

“Oh, it was just a dream. What a shock! Time to go back to sleep.”

That whole thing was just dream-ception?!

He was starting to lose track of what was what.

I think I should just give up on going to the bathroom and sleep… At least it’ll help me keep my mind off it…

He’d given up on going to pee.

I’ll just close my eyes and sleep… One sheep, two sheep…

“Oh~. I won’t let you sleep, Ryouta!” she yelled, and he jumped. She sure was attentive, considering her eyes were closed.

“Come now~. You can’t sleep yet~. The night is still young~.”

Dammit! Her sleep-talking is keeping me awake! I can’t believe this…

“Oh, they’ll notice if we make any noise. We don’t want that, do we?”

What are we doing, and where…? I really need to know…

“See, the owls will get away if we make any noise. We came all the way out here to enjoy some night-critter watching! You can’t fall asleep yet, even if you’re sleepy.”

Seriously, what the heck is going on?!

Afterward, Alfoncina kept talking about things that sent Ryouta’s imagination wild as she slept, and he didn’t get any shut-eye at all.

In the end, Alfoncina woke up right before they arrived in Tokyo Station.

“Yaaawn, that was a good nap~!” She outstretched both arms. “You know, I had so many strange dreams~.”

“Tell me later. Sorry, I really need to go to the bathroom!” Ryouta ran to the toilet.

When they arrived in Tokyo, both of them could feel the attention.

“People are staring at me… I really wish I could do something about this curse…”

“Hee-hee, you’re so popular~.”

“That isn’t funny; I mean it.” He doubted he would be abducted now as a high schooler, but it was still dangerous.

“I’ve actually come up with a way to make you a bit safer. Do you want to hear it?”

“Yes, tell me! I’ve never been anywhere with such a high population density before…”

“I’ll pretend to be your girlfriend.” Alfoncina grinned impishly. “Wouldn’t that significantly lessen the danger to you?”

“Well, that’s… I dunno…”

Even though it was just pretend at most, it was hard to ask her to do so outright.

“But if I act like a stranger toward you in this crowd, then you’ll have people hitting on you, isn’t that right~? Wouldn’t that be even worse~?”

“Hmm…if you put it that way, yeah…”

“If you don’t mind, I would act like a stranger~. I would happily watch and see what happens to you~.”

“W-wait! I feel like you’re just threatening me instead!”

“Then you need to ask me, okay~? Say please pretend to be my girlfriend.”

“Rrrgh… You’re above me here, and that makes this unfair…” But that didn’t change the fact that he had no other options. “P-please pretend to be my girlfriend…” Ryouta bowed his head—actually, he more just let it droop. He hated having to do this, but this was probably their safest option.

“Hee-hee-hee~. Now let’s find that traditional-medicine shop~.” Alfoncina grabbed Ryouta’s hand and marched forward.

“Whoa, whoa! Hold on!”

“Nope! This is our precious day off!”

“You don’t have to hold my hand—”

“Aren’t I pretending to be your girlfriend?”

“Oh, right… Sigh… I now understand why Shiren and Ouka were so on edge…” Ryouta’s head drooped again.

Somewhere in Tokyo…

…the two had come to an old, sketchy-looking medicine dispensary on a street corner.

Outside stood a line of frog and elephant mascots. But it wasn’t just one or two of them—there was a long row of them for some reason.

“This place looks really fishy. Is it even open?”

“This shop is the Kiyoshige Matsumoto Pharmacy, a place known only by those in the know.”

“The name sounds like it’s been copied from another famous shop.”

“Yeah, last year, I heard they changed the name from the Haruo Fujiwara Store to this~.”

“It’s an old store, but they really did copy it!”

When they stepped inside, they found a man sitting there, wearing sunglasses, a mask, and a hat, reading the horse-racing columns in the newspaper.

This is incredibly fishy… Fishy enough to make me think this guy’s doing it on purpose…

“Customers! What is it you’re looking for? I got a shipment of good powder in today, heh-heh.”

“Powder? What kind of powder…? Nothing illegal, I hope…”

“No. Starch.”

“That’s not something you sell at a medicine shop!”

“We also got in some Hokkaido flour, pastry flour, hard flour, bread flour, fish meal, pancake mix, Parmesan cheese—we have all the powders you can think of, heh-heh…”

“Someone’s going to think you’re a smuggler and get you arrested someday…”

“So this shop specializes in powder~. But they decided to start dealing in traditional medicines as well, so they changed the name from the Haruo Fujiwara Store to the Kiyoshige Matsumoto Pharmacy.”

“Oh, so that’s why they changed from a ‘store’ to a ‘pharmacy’!”

“Exactly. And I wear glasses and a mask to keep the powders out of my nose and eyes when I handle them. And I wear a hat to keep it out of my hair.”

“Oh, so there was a reason!” It was inconsequential, really, but at least one of the mysteries had been solved.

“Some Jieyi pills, please, sir!” Alfoncina produced three ten-thousand-yen bills. It really was expensive medicine.

The shop owner brought out a box that was just the right size to hold a small bottle.

“Now that’s an unusual one you’re after today. This is all I have left. I don’t know when I’ll get my next shipment in.”

“What a relief~. I’ve heard there are only so many places that sell it~.”

“Oh yeah, make yourself a point card. You’ll fill it up with twenty thousand yen, which means you’ll get five hundred yen off your next purchase.”

“Never would’ve guessed a place like this had point cards…”

“You can also pay with your train card.”

“Why is that the modern part of this shop?!” The shop owner was a fishy man, but at least they’d gotten what they needed easily.

“Now your minion transformation will be undone~.” Alfoncina retrieved the bottle from the box and smiled.

“Thank you! I’ll use it right now!”

But as he reached out to take the bottle, she quickly pulled it back and put it away.

“Not yet. First, you’ll have to work off the debt~.”

“Yeah, I guess that was a little too convenient…” Ryouta was in no position to pony up 29,800 yen right away, either, so he couldn’t argue.

Plus, this was Alfoncina’s first day off in a long time; if he didn’t at least accompany her where she wanted to go, how heartless would that be?

“All right. I’ll stick with you the whole day!” He made up his mind.

“Of course you will!” Alfoncina tugged Ryouta along by his hand again.

Her hands are so pretty…

Her hand- and nail-care were impeccable, probably because she was the archbishop. He wondered where she found the time for it.

“Right, first, let’s go to a very quintessential Tokyo spot!”

“Quintessential Tokyo? Like Asakusa or Skytree? Or Shinjuku, maybe?”

“This is what I think of when I think of Tokyo~.” Alfoncina had chosen Akihabara.

“Is this quintessential Tokyo…? Well, it is a sightseeing spot in a way.”

He could see both Japanese and foreign tourists everywhere.

“It is pretty impressive with all this stuff around. There aren’t even enough people in the Empire to fill up these streets.”

“But Ouka did say she was going to build something like this on a smaller scale. In the future, she said she wants to have casinos, theme parks, and nerd neighborhoods in order to bring in the foreign cash.”

“I wouldn’t put that past her…”

Ouka struck Ryouta as the type to do anything for money, and he didn’t doubt that intuition.

“She said we’re going to make a lot of money because harsh pay-to-win tactics in games are allowed under Empire law.”

“That’s so sketchy!”

“I’ve also heard she’s making knockoff stuffed animals of the mascots from a certain famous theme park~.”

“Isn’t the copyright holder going to come after her?!”

“She said, ‘A person sound of mind would take one look and give up. But once you lose a few brain cells, you’ll want to give it a try. I’m going to do everything I can to copy things that sell well!’”

“She’s trying to make it sound cool, but it isn’t at all!”

The phrasing had a dramatic sense of resolve, but the idea was cheap.

“And, uh, Alfoncina? Can I ask you something…?”

“Sure, what is it?”

“Can we stop holding hands…? I sometimes feel like the people staring at us are going, Ugh, what’s a happy couple doing here? Go back to Shibuya or Harajuku or whatever.”

It stung a bit.

He couldn’t do anything about the attention he received from girls thanks to the curse, but he felt like the men were glaring at him, too.

“What~? You’re being too sensitive.” Alfoncina drew even closer to him, until her chest was pressing up against him. That was definitely on purpose.

“Look, the people who come here are concentrating on their shopping, so of course, they’re not going to pay attention to every other couple they come across. The jealous ones are amateurs who have not yet reached enlightenment. I came here five times over every two days, so trust me.”

“That’s too much. People from the Empire sure like overdoing things…but we probably shouldn’t put on too much of a display, so let’s just—”

“Oh, I’ve suddenly been overcome by the urge to throw the Jieyi pills into the river~.”

“What?”

“Oh dear. That shop we just went to is out of stock, so it would be quite troublesome for you to lose them, but I’m sooo young and impulsive~. All right, let’s go to the Kanda River—”

“Fine, fine! We can stay like this!” He apparently had no other choice but to follow her lead today. He resigned himself to his fate.

“Good. I’m glad you understand,” she replied smugly. This was one of those times where being owed a favor carried its own kind of power.

“Why don’t we head into one of these stores, then~? I want to take a look at the manga~.” They entered a nearby specialty store called The Cat’s Hollow. Obviously, the walls were covered with manga and light novels.

“Oh yeah, I’ve never been in a place like this before.”

There were some manga-only shops in Oshiro, but he wasn’t deep into the otaku lifestyle, so this was his first experience.

“Oh, hey, they have the new volumes of You’re Rouko, I’m Kouko! over there!” Ryouta decided to let the creator know they were in stock.

But Alfoncina wasn’t next to him anymore. “Ah, I see, so this is what’s on the bestseller lists. And this, too. I think this one might be plateauing. I suppose what’s sitting over there is the extra stock. I’m not quite familiar with any of those titles there anyway. From the inventory on the shelves, I assume this is the next most popular.”

She was very seriously checking to see what books were placed where and how they were selling.

“Um, are you doing a sales analysis?”

“I am. I need to note this—note, note.”

She immediately started writing notes down in her phone, like a real pro. Well, she was a pro.

“Um, are you sure this is good data if you only see what’s selling from one specific store?”

“That is part of it. But there are many things you will never know unless you go into the field yourself. Without any firsthand knowledge, you will start prioritizing your assumption of what is currently popular when you create. That means you will fall behind on trends and feel a bit pathetic, or you will end up sending products to stores that are out of line with the needs of the market. Your assumptions will always be different from reality, you know. Of course, you do need to use your imagination a bit when you create something, but when you let your imagination decide everything, you will end up making a strange product that is not in line with reality.”

“Uh-huh…”

She continued her explanation with utter seriousness. “And I know this sounds contradictory, but checking only the popular things is a common pitfall. The outliers alone won’t give you a picture of the whole, of what ties everything together. Or if you do find a common thread between them, then most of the time, you’ll usually find that specific thread can greatly apply to things that aren’t selling well, too. And you need to take into consideration the different publishers. Each publisher has its specialties, you see. It’s quite dangerous to look only at what is doing well and ignore all these other factors. You’ll end up with a survey that makes you feel better about yourself, but the survey itself is heavily skewed. It’s better than studying only what is doing badly, but it’s best to widen your scope.”

“You sure are talking a lot all of a sudden, Alfoncina…”

The date-like atmosphere around them had vanished, too.

“Oh, Ryouta, can you buy one copy each of all the books that are ranked one to ten in the doujinshi corner? Here, use this.” She thrust a ten-thousand-yen bill at him.

“Uhhh, where’s the doujinshi corner…?”

“Ask a staff member.”

“All right!”

And so Ryouta ended up going upstairs and buying a bunch of doujinshi. He really felt like her attendant.

“Phew… Wow, going to a real store is a learning experience~. I feel like I’ve leveled up here~.”

“I’m kind of tired…”

The trip had given Alfoncina a shot in the arm, while Ryouta was just feeling drained. Maybe that was the difference between nerds and non-nerds.

Grrrrrrowl.

Ryouta’s stomach rumbled out of exhaustion.

“Oh, that’s right, it’s past twelve. Shall we have lunch?”

“Yeah… Oh, I’ll pay you afterward, so—”

“I know a good place, so why don’t we go there? Taxi!” She raised her hand to hail a taxi.

“Wait…do high schoolers use taxis?” Ryouta was getting some culture shock.

“Of course. Better not to waste time. Driver, take us to Ningyo-cho, please~.”

They arrived in Ningyo-cho almost right away, given how close it was to Akihabara. They came to a stop before an establishment that could have been around forever.

“This place is definitely going to be expensive, Alfoncina…and people are lined up outside.” Ryouta lived a modest life with Shiren, so this was far enough beyond his means that it made him hesitant.

“Why are you scared? Let’s go in~.”

“What kind of place is this anyway…?”

“They serve chicken and rice bowls.”

“Oh, then I guess it won’t be that expensive…”

“We’ll be having the five-thousand-yen course.”

“Five thousand yen for lunch?!”

Alfoncina called out to one of the staff members, “Excuse me, I have a reservation under…K-Kimura…”

“You really don’t want to say your name, do you?”

Thanks to their reservation, they were taken to a room that looked like it’d been ported right out of an expensive ryokan. The place was entirely made up of private rooms, it seemed like.

“Oh, I’ll have a glass of oolong tea to drink. What are you having, Ryouta?”

“Uhhh, something cheap, at least…”

“Then two glasses of oolong tea to drink, please. That’s it for us~.”

“Uh, is all this part of the Empire’s travel budget?”

They were probably getting discounts, but he still wondered if this was okay.

“Hmm? Everything is coming out of my pocket. I’m paying for this trip myself,” she replied, somewhat bemused.

“Ouka hasn’t paid a single yen! And this is supposed to be work!”

He’d had a feeling she was cheap, but this was a shock, nonetheless.

“And with your pocket money, you’re paying for a lunch that costs five thousand yen per person (drinks not included)…” This was almost too much for him to process. “Uh…I’ll pay my portion of food later, so could you pick something cheaper…?”

“Aw, no~. You don’t have to worry about any of this~. How can we not spend money on our special trip~?”

“Sorry, but how much was the suit…?”

“Oh~. That was cheap~. One hundred fifty-eight thousand yen.”

“Pffft!” Ryouta choked.

“What’s wrong, Ryouta? Are you ill?”

“I’m starting to realize that money doesn’t mean the same thing to you as it does to me…”

If he bought an article of clothing that cost one hundred fifty-eight thousand yen using the Fuyukura household funds, then he’d get put in time-out.

“I have two T-shirts I use when I’m at home, and I got them both on sale for fifteen hundred yen…”

“You do wear cheap clothes, don’t you, Ryouta?” she said point-blank. “Do you want to go shopping later? I’ll pay.”

“Please, no! I mean it…,” Ryouta said, still choking.

If he let her use her money on him, he had a feeling he would never be able to refuse her again…

Afterward, Ryouta watched with disbelief as unbelievable amounts of money flew from one set of hands to another.

“The sweets here are so tasty~.”

“Uh…why does one ice-cream cone cost fifteen hundred yen…? That’s more expensive than a whole meal at a diner…”

After the sweets shop—

“I think this watch would suit you well, don’t you think, Ryouta? And it’s cheap, too.”

“How much?”

“Fifty thousand.”

“Pffft!”

—she bought him a fifty-thousand-yen watch.

And that was essentially how their night went.

Eventually, they sat together in Odaiba, gazing out over the water.

“Sigh, capitalism is terrifying… So is money in general…” Ryouta found himself exhausted by something even he didn’t quite understand. “Huh…I feel dizzy, but I haven’t been on a boat or anything… Am I drunk on money…?” After all, the whirlwind life of a celebrity would be too much for the mind of a commoner.

“Wow, I had a lot of fun today~! Thank you, Ryouta!” Alfoncina snuggled up to him. “Do you think we look like a couple~?”

“I’m scared I look less like your boyfriend and more like your sugar baby.”

Coming to watch the sunset in Odaiba seemed like a “couples-only” kind of activity, and everyone nearby was paired off.

“I guess I kinda am a sugar baby…but I don’t really have any other way to make money…”

It wasn’t like students were forbidden from working in the Empire, but it was a small country, which meant there weren’t a lot of high-paying options.

“I think if we make Ouka an exception, you might be the richest person in the Empire, Alfoncina…”

There was no way for him to know how much, but he was certain that YouRou IKou! was bringing in the dough.

And I bet there are people who’d want to be her sugar baby in the Empire, too…

Then a question suddenly came to mind. “Oh yeah, why don’t you get a boyfriend?”

The reason he worded it the way he did was because he knew if she wanted one, she could easily find someone.

“Hmm~. I’ve never dated anyone before, so I don’t know.”

“No way, you’re kidding me.”

That was hard to believe.

“Oh, how mean! I’m not kidding you! I was so busy with lessons in elementary and middle school that I had no time for boys…”

“I see… What kind of lessons were you going to?”

“Oh, calligraphy. Swimming. Ballet. And I had to study the teachings of the Holy Church of the Sacred Blood, too.”

“Wow, ballet… You really are like nobility…”

“I also learned how to draw manga, went to creative-writing classes, and took classical Chinese lessons…”

“I see where You’re Rouko, I’m Kouko! came from!”

Her lessons had neatly led to her work.

“And then tennis. Golf. Detective training. Debate club. Equestrianism. Model government… I forget the rest.”

Sometimes, Ryouta had trouble believing Sasara was from a noble family, but Alfoncina was certainly the real deal.

“So that’s why I never had friends~,” she said, as if it was nothing.

“What…? But you’re so cheery all the time…”

She didn’t seem like the loner type.

“Oh, I wasn’t bullied or anything like that. I suppose people kept their distance out of respect? They sensed the step off aura, or so they told me.”

“I guess I get that…”

Few guys could muster the strength to ask out such a prim and proper young lady.

If Ryouta were her classmate, he’d probably stay away, too.

“Even the other girls were too scared to talk to me~. Oh, these aren’t painful memories or anything, so don’t worry too much about it,” Alfoncina assured him, and her expression was, indeed, unclouded. “I was ready for all this—I lived knowing that would happen, I suppose, so it didn’t hurt at all. Even with your curse, you’ve managed to survive, right? Everyone’s definition of common sense is just slightly different from everyone else’s.”

“Yeah, I sometimes wonder what ‘normal’ really is.” Ryouta’s life was far removed from someone else’s definition of “normal.”

“That’s right. And my normal was one without any friends.” Alfoncina paused, as though she was ruminating on something. “But I had a lot of fun when I met Ouka~. It felt like I’d finally met someone I could get along with who came from similar circumstances.”

“I guess you are archbishop and emperor, after all.”

Ryouta was starting to understand why they were running the Empire as friends.

Only special people could understand how it felt to be in their position. Most people didn’t live in the world these two did.

“That’s why I’ve decided to give it my all as archbishop while Ouka does what she can as emperor. She tends to keep to herself~.”

Ryouta cracked a small smile. “That’s right. She talks big talk, but she’s so sensitive. She’d get mad at me if I said that to her, though.”

Had he ever spoken about Ouka like this before? He and Alfoncina could be friends for a long time, he felt.

“Yes~. You could say she sends mixed messages. I always need to come in and support her; otherwise, things could get bad for her~.”

“Then you’ll have to keep supporting her.”

“Indeed. That’s why I’m hoping we’ll get through our work tomorrow safely~.”

There was something ominous about what she said.

Was the next day going to be that dangerous? No, it couldn’t be. It was just supposed to be a meeting.

“It will be like a battle, in a way. We have to stay on guard~.”

“Uh, so tomorrow, what—?”

“All right, I think it’s time we head to our hotel!” Alfoncina smiled, dispelling the foreboding aura.

Ryouta couldn’t ask about work when she smiled like that. “You’re right, let’s go.”

“Yeah. Thank you so much for everything today, Ryouta. I had a lot of fun on our date,” Alfoncina said sheepishly. “Even though I’d been to all the places we visited already, going with you made them feel fresher, more special… Truly, thank you.”

“No, I was just following you… Sorry I was useless…” Ryouta fidgeted, too, after that point-blank compliment.

“If only our next date was a real one… I’m not comfortable with them yet, so I’m not sure how it’ll turn out…”

“You can’t just shift the topic in that direction…”

“Let’s get to the hotel, then…”

“O-oh, sure… Yeah…”

Both with awkward smiles, the two made their way toward their lodgings for the night.